BZPB

<Malchior IV>

*Captain Eurobeat enters the bridge of the Night of Fire, which has come out of hyperspace just above the atmosphere of the planet. He has changed into more casual wear. A pretty big guy sits in the captain's chair*

Captain Eurobeat: Lt. Rogers. I'll leave you in command of the ship until I return.

Lt. Rogers: Yes, sir.

Captain Eurobeat: Lt. Parrish, will you be accompanying me to the planet's surface?

Lt. Parrish: Not if I can avoid it.

Captain Eurobeat: [CENSORED BY ORDER OF THE GRAND POOBAH]

Lt. Parrish: *sighing* Fine, I'll come. But I'm taking the P90s.

---

<Malchior IV, Spaceport>

*Some time later, the Night of Fire's landing shuttle settles down in a private landing bay, and Eurobeat and co step out. Captain Eurobeat turns to the wind, and grins.*

Captain Eurobeat: Amazing... it's difficult to understand how a race as warlike as ours can bloom on such a beautiful world. Leslie, I should tell you the reason I've come here.

Lt. Parrish: That... would be appreciated.

*The two crossed the tarmac to the central terminal, and entered*

Captain Eurobeat: Have you ever heard of a man named... Uterio di Arm-

*Lt. Parrish's hand shot over his mouth, and she dragged him behind a column, out of sight*

Lt. Parrish: Not so loud! This planet was devastated by him during the war. People are still recovering from it... that name could spark a riot. Especially if said by an outsider.

*He gently pulled her hand away from his mouth, and resumed walking through the terminal*

Captain Eurobeat: Then you clearly understand the gravity of his actions. He didn't just crave power; he craved more power. A man like him can never be satisfied, and no goal of his could ever be met. Yet, in spite of this, he waged a war in which billions died.

*They left the terminal, and began walking down the street*

Captain Eurobeat: I have reason to believe another such individual is currently biding their time somewhere in the universe, waiting for the correct moment to resurface.

Lt. Parrish: Resurface?

Captain Eurobeat: Yes... this pressure... it's been gone from the universe for some time. I can't quite place who or what it is... but it lurks, like a predatory bird on the edge of my mind. It's the pressure of the end of time.

Lt. Parrish: Is it Ascheron?

Captain Eurobeat: Gabriel Ascheron? Hmm... no. I don't believe the pressure I feel originates from that man. But he might not be entirely disconnected from the situation.

*Captain Eurobeat hailed for a cab, and stepped inside when one arrived. Leslie followed suit*

Captain Eurobeat: Take us to MacDaniel, on 37th street.

Lt. Parish: MacDaniel?

Captain Eurobeat: A hamburger restaurant. The truth is, it's frequented by members of Project D. It's an organization I've had contact with in the past - they'll know more about the present situation than I do.

<The Assault Shadow>

Vexull stood in place with a shocked expression. After a few moments, he stumbled forwards and fell to the floor. His greenish robe fell apart like ribbons, followed by his skin.

"You... monster..." Vexull gasped as his physical form collapsed into nothingness. Oddly, there was nothing under his skin but blue energy, which quickly dissipated like gas. His two companions looked on in horror, unable to save him now.

The red-robed monk twirled around his sword and pointed it at Ascheron, firmly gripping it in both hands.

"FLAMMATION!" he cried, launching a jet of fire from his sword at the chest of his opponent.

The purple monk acted similarly, shouting "ELECTRIFICATION", but this being's attack was directed at the ship's equipment in an attempt to cripple it. Bolts of energy leaped from his sword all around the bridge, causing untold damage.

------------------------------------

<Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

*Etende re-enters Lalli's ship, yawning as she searches for somewhere to sleep*

*She finds a sleeping bag that looks relatively undisturbed, so she takes off her jetsuit and climbs into it, falling asleep shortly afterwards*

*Nohex grins and gives a thumbs-up to Klak as the shutters on his mask, which are shaped like sunglasses, are closed*

*A snoring sound seems to indicate that he fell asleep standing up*

------------------------------------

<Quolas's fortress>

Quolas: I do not know. I grow weary... much of my energy has been depleted.

Kakamu: Do you need sleep?

*Quolas chuckles half-heartedly*

Quolas: No. If I do not regain my energy, I will die.

*Kakamu splutters*

Kakamu: We have to do something!

Quolas: Yes. I think I have the energy for a final trip to the realm of my masters. There, I can regain what I have lost.

Kakamu: Of course, but once there, will you be able to find your way back?

Quolas: Hmm... I'm not sure.

Kakamu: Then we need to find out when and where we are.

Quolas: As you wish.

Kakamu: Come on Nadle, let's take a walk. Bob, keep an eye on him. If anything happens, come up and shout.

------------------------------------

<Tunisia>

???1: Holy crap. An alien who speaks English? In Tunisia? Dave, did you put something in my flask?

Dave: Nope! Thanks for the idea, though.

???1: I don't believe this!

Dave: What's the big deal, Mike? There's loads of English-speaking aliens around.

Mike: Yeah, but Tunisia? Don't people usually speak Arabic in Tunisia?

Dave: Don't be prejudiced, Mike, people can speak English if they want to.

*Mike cocks his AK and aims down its sights at D-Klak*

Mike: Alright bud, I dunno what you're gonna do with that big fancy key of yours, but it certainly ain't the key to my heart. Hand it over.

------------------------------------

<Stelta-Stal>

Xikila: Starok has been captured. Ordak has fled. Kivalon is wounded, and I overheard Kakamu express a desire to abandon our conflict and return home. Which means... you are our leader now.

*Xikila kneels in front of him and places a crystalline dagger at his feet*

Xikila: Together, we will succeed where they have failed. We will draw blood.

------------------------------------

<Outside Supermax 282>

*The airtight skip floats through space with the joke characters trapped inside while Koranis flies away with the rest of the ship*

Seran: Anyone's got a phone to call for helpings?

<The Assault Shadow>

Ascheron grinned, thrusting his fore and index fingers into the fire.

"Ryūki o kyūshū!"

The fire seared away at his hands, but blue currents of Prominence energy running under his skin began to glow, leading to his eyes. They, too, began to glow, and Prominence energy began to feed back along the gout of fire, causing his attacker to struggle, until an explosion of energy at the base of the stream stopped it, sending Ascheron's attacked flying backwards. Ascheron shot forward, flying through the smoke of the explosion, Prominence blades extended from his finger tips.

"Ryūki o attō suru!"

He began stabbing into his attacker as he had done before, but without rotating; instead he followed him on his trajectory through the air.

"This is the power of humanity! This is the power to overcome destiny! Do..."

He kicked off from the monk, landing on the floor, his fingers held together so that the two Prominence blades merged into one. The monk impacted the wall of the throne room.

"...You..."

Ascheron shot forwards, impaling the monk on the blade, and spinning him around, throwing him off the ground and back into the air. He ran underneath him, then jumped, spearing him through the back with the combined Prominence blades.

"...UNDERSTAND?!"

He pulled the blades apart whilst they were still inside him, tearing them out of his body. He spun backwards, kicking the monk back into the wall, and thrust the Prominence blades towards the second monk as he landed. The blades detached from Ascheron's body, crossing over eachother to form an X as they tore through the second monk's body, impacting the wall behind him and destroying it completely.

<Malchior IV, Church>

Anzu's mouth twitched into a small smile. "I forgive your outburst, for now. Even so, Mazkertis threatens us all."

His face fell to its usual dourness. "I will come once the Claws meet together. Expect me then, and no sooner. Angels need not sleep." And with that, he spread his ebon wings, and flew off into the night. "You better be right about this, my lord." he muttered.

---

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Sachiel opened the door. "Yes? What do you need?"

----

<Mordor>

"Save the questions for later," Hassan replied. She glanced left, right, then upward. "It was Eos who tipped me off to this attempt to break Figlio out. Until we are safely aboard the Zodiark, don't ask me any more questions."

A clamor of voices - no doubt guards came from one of the passageways. She pointed down the direction she had come from. "Go," she intoned meaningfully, beginning to run down the passage.

----

<Dominaria, Imperial Palace>

"My lord Malygos, we have heard yet another report of ships in the possession of rebel Saskana bearing the Imperial Star."

The emperor sighed, dismissing the report. "Those Saskanan dogs continue to insult us time and time again. It is time we finally struck back." They stood up, opening a channel to General Hydraxis. "General, it is time we made our move. Is the Bahamut ready?"

"Yes. Would you prefer I piloted the thing myself?"

Malygos paused for a moment, then shook their head. "No. If we are truly to make a statement, I must pilot this myself."

----

<Saskana, some time later>

Just as the ships were powering up to fire, a massive flare of energy came over - a warning shot. Above them, a grand, massive ship of a new design, elegant in silvers and violets, each weapon folding into an elegant shape. The ship was decarated with beautiful silver filigree, its shape not unlike that of a stylized dragon. On the ships bow lay the prominent violet star of the Dominion, on the flank, the ship's name. Bahamut.

A transmission flared at the rogue fighters. It was none other than Malygos. "This is the Dominion flagship Bahamut. We demand your immediate surrender of our ships, as per the treaty signed after the grand Ascension Battle."

OOS: Tell you what, let's bring everybody together.

-----

<The Pale Fire>

Starscream: So, where are we off now?

Blackout: Well, I intend to pay a visit to our newest allies, the Saskanans.

Starscream: Never heard of them.

Blackout: You wouldn't, it's a backwater. But it used to be part of Malygos' empire before its governor got ambitious, so it's become rather useful to me.

-----

<Saskana>

Ynot: I appreciate the help, guys, but believe me. We really only need one volley.


*The ships prepare to open fire on the Cabana, when the Bahamut appears*

*Commander Conway replies*

Conway: We signed no treaty, Emperor. This is an Independent Republic. Your laws have no meaning here. Depart, or you'll soon be reminded of everything you left behind on our world!


*The Cabana intercepts Malygos' message*

Ynot: Malygos? Here? I thought he'd be gone for a while.

TPK: That is his habit.

Ynot: How would you know?

TPK: I'm an emperor too, you know.

*Ynot sends a telepathic message to Malygos*

Ynot: O'Mally, while I appreciate the distraction, you are definitely here for the wrong reasons. Mazkertis is down there. I trust a man with your contacts has heard of Mazkertis?


*Suddenly, the Pale Fire drops out of a portal above the Bahamut*

*Blackout scans the situation from the bridge, noting a great Dominion warship and another ship bearing the distinct signs of having been constructed by Ynot*

Blackout: Well, well, well. Looks like we got here just in time for a grand conflagration.

Starscream: Is that even a word?

*He sends a message to both ships*

Blackout: Dominion ship, be advised. The planet below is a treaty ally of the ZFT. We would not recommend aggression. And, as for you, Ynot, what the blazes are you doing here? Don't tell me you're working with the Dominion after all they've done!


Ynot: Oh, you have got to be kidding me.

TPK: No, this is a good thing, Ynot. Now, all the superpowers of this galaxy are in one place.

Ynot: Yeah, if only we can get them to work together.....

---

*The ship crashes into the water, and Strika and Perseus are flung against the barrier*

*The hull gives way in several places, and water starts flooding into the ship, which begins to slowly sink*


*Von Budberg looks down at the crashed ship*

Von Budberg: Hooooo vhere zhose people? I wonder if they came for me..... or for him.

-----

<Mordor>

*Turel sighs*

*Suddenly, a giant hole appears in the ground in front of Hassan, and Black Phantom, IG-88, and Straxus float out one by one*

Black Phantom: Four individuals. One identified as target, Figlio Di Armechio. One identified as Turel, known collaborator. One identified as Angonce, and one unknown. Commence termination,

*Black Phantom prepares to attack, but Turel leaps up to him and punches him to the ground*

Turel: You talk too much.

*Straxus charges at him with his axe, and the two begin fighting*

*Meanwhile, Black Phantom gets up as if nothing had happened, and fires a plasma blast at Figlio*

-----

<Malchior IV>

Aster: Probably. Now, I can shape-shift, but we'll have to do something about you. Hold on.

*She leaves to go to the bathroom*

*A few minutes later, a completely different woman walks up to Rainn*

???: Hey, Rainn. It's me?

*Meanwhile, the shape-shifter finishes his coffee and leaves*

-----

<The Bat-Cave>

F-Blackout: Thank god she's finally gone. Now, where do we begin?

-----

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*Senator Skedaddle calmly pulls two more sheets of paper out of the folder*

*One is a transcript of Vazquez having a less-than-proper telephone conversation with an intern, and the other is a set of text messages from one NSA bigwig to another*

Bigwig 1: "Did you send the PoMAL that Vazquez file?"

Bigwig 2: "Yeah, why?"

Bigwig 1: "Just checking"

-----

<Stelta-Stal>

Ricochet: Um, yeah. I remain loyal to you too, master Caiaphus.

*He starts to roll down the hill and towards a lake of lava*

<The Assault Shadow>

The white energy hidden beneath the red monk's skin began to glow brighter as he fell from the wall to the floor. His robes were in tatters, so he weakly discarded them by pulling them over his head. His true form was a strange sight: he looked almost like man, with abdominal muscles, two arms and two legs, but there were four claws closed shut in place of a chest, presumably containing the light within. As he rose to his feet, he began chanting something, with his voice becoming gradually deeper.

"Twekka fe, pakku somma clena fe, somma clen twekka..."

The pincers over his chest then opened up and the light within was released in an explosion. A shockwave of light spread over the ship, which seemed to cause time itself to slow in its wake. Ascheron observed the monk pick up his sword, whisper something else, and then hurl it at him as it ignited with fire once again. However, although Ascheron found himself thinking just as quickly as before, it seems his body was affected by the wave of light. He could now only move half as fast as before.

------------------------------------

<Stelta-Stal>

*Xikila looks at Ricochet, raises an eyebrow, and turns back to Caiaphus again*

Xikila: Would you like me to retrieve him?

------------------------------------

<Malchior IV, Church>

Arkhite: Oh boy.

*Arkhite walks away and anxiously taps the side of his mask*

Micros: Alright, who put an ad for us in the newspaper?!

<The Assault Shadow>

Ascheron grimaced as the flaming blade spun towards him. He shot up his hands to block, but the blade flew in between them, impacting him in the dead center of the chest. Blood shot from his mouth as he slid back, his boots scraping against the ground. He impacted the wall, blood spraying from his mouth, as his head rolled forwards.

Then, he looked back up at the monk, and grinned.

"Clearly, you do not understand."

He opened his arms, revealing a blue glow illuminating his chest. A layer of Prominence energy had materialized between the tip of the blade and Ascheron's chest.

"Prominence energy propagates at the speed of light. This means that even at half speed, it's still the fastest weapon in the room!"

The blade fell from his chest, and a beam of Prominence energy shot forth where it impacted, cutting through his chest, cancelling the time-slowing effect and sending him flying back against the wall. Ascheron rushed up to meet him, his fingertips glowing with energy. He shot them forth into the Monk's forehead as he rose from the wall.

"You are already dead."

He kicked off the monk's chest, landing on the floor. Prominence energy began to surge within the monk's body, flaming out of his eyes and mouth, before he exploded violently. Ascheron adjusted his cufflinks as Altian re-entered the bridge.

"My - My Lord!"

"There's no time for conversation. Assemble all troops in the hangar bay; I need to address the people of the Republic."

"Yes, My Lord."

---

<Some time later, Assault Shadow, hangar bay>

The entire military complement of the Assault Shadow - some 40,000 soldiers - was assembled in complete silence before the podium. Banners had been hung from either side of the wall, with the largest - showing the Ascheron family crest superimposed over the sigil of Luria - hung behind the podium. It was here that Ascheron stood, alone. Before him tremendous presence, even the void-gate integrity field had ceased to hum.

After four minutes of solid silence, he began to speak.

"Citizens of Luria. Brave soldiers of the Republic. You will have all seen the footage of the battle fought on this very ship. Many of you may fear for the safety of Luria after the events that have unfolded. To you people, I will say this: feel no fear! Instead, it is the enemies of the Republic who are trembling in the face of our glorious advance. We have attained the power of Gods!"

He slammed his fist onto the podium.

"The elite that rule over this universe, and do with as they see fit, have finally been forced to recognize us and the threat to them that our destiny poses! And they are in absolute terror of what we represent! The attack you have all witnessed it just the first of many. But to those who would attempt to defeat us, I say; come! It is a clear sign we are on the right path! We gain nothing by sitting idly by and letting this imbalance of power perpetuate itself. Instead, we shall hunt down our oppressors! We shall overwhelm them! We shall destroy them, and leave no survivors!"

He shot his arms into the air.

"The cycle of injustice shall be broken! The injustices done against the people of Luria will be avenged, a hundredfold! We will restore this universe to its natural order, with us as its rightful rulers! Too long have we waited in the shadows, clinging to the ground in the hopes that our civilization might survive to exist, in the face of every urging of the human soul! And now, at this crossroad of destiny, we cannot turn down from the tremendous fate we have been awarded! We will take our fight to the stars! We will take our fight to the heavens! For the perpetuation of the ideals of the Republic! For justice, and for vengeance! SIEG! LURIA!"

The reply was tremendous. The chant of a new empire had been created in an instant. Thousands of voices, repeating in time; Sieg Luria, Sieg Luria, Sieg Luria! The story was no different in the homeland. Streets filled with people from all walks of life; children, doctors, teachers, workers, mothers - all of them who had assembled to watch the broadcast. The same chant echoed from their mouths. Sieg Luria, Sieg Luria, Sieg Luria.

Altero watched with horror from the cockpit of his ship, which hung just beyond the visual range of the Assault Shadow. His hands were shaking on the controls as he pulled the nose of the ship around, and shot away from Ascheron's vessel. It was too late for him to do anything.

Alone, at least.

---

<Even more time later>

Ascheron entered his quarters, and sighed. He pulled his jacket off and threw of over the back of his reading chair, before thumbing the light-switch. He made towards the drinks cabinet, retrieving a bottle, and two small glasses.

"Oh, you remembered me?"

Ascheron frowned. "I suspected you'd have something to say about what I just did."

He poured out two drinks, and made towards the couch. A woman lay across it, dressed in a black silk poncho and a pair of black leggings. Her blonde hair was tied in a ponytail, which hung over the edge of the chair, the tip of it touching the carpet below.

"Do you think I did the right thing?" he asked, sitting down opposite her in the reading chair. He placed the drinks on a small table between them.

"No." she replied. "But I don't think you think you did, either." she added, reaching over and grabbing her glass before pouring it down her throat. She winced. "Furthermore, I don't think you ever have cared about doing the right thing."

"Then I suppose that makes us birds of a feather."

"Birds of a feather?" she replied, frowning. "Birds of a genus, more like."

Ascheron smirked, and downed his drink.

<Malchior IV, MacDaniel>

At a table in the corner of the empty restaurant sits a man in his mid thirties. He is wearing a black roll-neck cord sweater and black combat slacks. Over his jumper sits a twin armpit holster in light tan; the handles of two huge pistols poke out from under his muscled arms, as well as the bone handle of a bowie knife under his left arm. His face is sharp down the center, with a long nose and sharp chin, but wide at the periphery, with a strong jaw and temples. His hair is buzzed at the sides, and a dark black colour; however the top is long, a bleached blonde flop that reaches the nape of his neck. His forehead is graced with a drastic widows peak. He has dark bags under his heavily lidded eyes, and a cigarette pokes from the corner of his thin lips. His is staring adoringly at a Big Dan burger, which oozes ketchup onto hands clad in fingerless tan driving gloves. A pair of white boxing footwraps complete his attire. He brings the burger up to his mouth, the cigarette dropping tentatively as he drools. It is mere inches away now, the meat, the lettuce, the ketchup, the onio-

The double glass doors of the restaurant swing open and Captain Eurobeat et.al enter. The man rolls his eyes dramatically and drops the burger on the table with a resounding splat. He stands and slowly drags one massive revolver from its harness under his arm, levelling it at Eurobeat.

"Who in hell's name are you?"

OOS: Welcome to BZPB, Claymore!

<Malchior IV, Outside MacDaniel's>

*A young woman in her early 30s carrying a set of poster tries to get into the restaurant after the Captain enters*

---

<Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

Lalli Cain: "Just remember, I'm the one you're paying."

*Lalli Cain gets inside his ship, and goes to his quarters*

Me: Good question, Micros. I'm not exactly a fan of overkill, but if this will stop all the threats we have before us, then it's worth it. *He pauses* The others had better hurry....

*Lalli suddenly widens his eyes before he falls asleep*

Lalli Cain: "Oh Rækallin! I forgot about Ti'ika and Ravat! Dang it!"

---

<Quolas' fortress>

*Bob salutes Kakamu, and stares at Quolas*

Bob: "If you don't recharge, will you die?"

*Nadle follows Kakamu*

Nadle: "We had better hurry and get back to our time period. Hopefully, everything is still alright."

---

<Tunisia>

*D-Klak raises an eyebrow, then looks at his gunblade.*

D-Klak: "You've got the wrong Klak, gentlemen. Mike and Dave, was it? Put down your weapons, and I'm sure we can come to an agreement. I have to save the universe, after all."

---

<Stelta-Stal>

*Caiaphus grabs the knife, and raises it to the sky. He touches it with his finger, and scowls at it*

Caiaphus: "The blood of the universe."

*Xikella asks about Ricochet*

Caiaphus: "Yes. Let's figure out a way to restore him. I need a valuable asset while our friends recuperate. As for SM Kakamu, he is lost to me...unless he returns."

---

<Outside Supermax 282>

Doug: "There is one man."

Linkara: "Wait, him?"

Doug: "Yes."

*Paul claps his hands in excitement as Doug calls a friend.*

*The speed of this deep plot causes the small ship of this newcomer to arrive quickly. It turns around, and catches the container with its tractor beam*

*They arrive on board, and get out. The ship's pilot emerges from the cockpit, but his identity seems to be obscured*

JC Denton: "WHO ARE YOU?!"

Spanha: "Is this a trap? I don't want to die!"

Spoony: "Take it easy! We know him."

Linkara: "Yeah, no panicking. He's one of us."

*This man emerges*

Malcolm: "WE'RE NOT DOING THE SUPERVILLAIN SHUFFLE!!"

---

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Fourteen: "I've got a bloody headache, I'm a telepath, this is a problem. Let's talk."

---

<Mordor>

*Figlio grits his teeth, and crouches, dodging the plasma blast. He charges at Black Phantom, brandishing his sword*

*Angonce grunts in annoyance*

---

<Saskana, Space>

Axalara: "Not all the superpowers. Not yet."

*She looks out the window with a twinkle in her eye, and a face beaming with hope.*

Coro: "We must not let them fight each other. Mazkertis is probably slaughtering the planet as we speak!"

D-Klak (4): "But how the hell do we convince them?"

*Coro looks at all of the ships, then walks back*

Coro: "This could hurt me, but it's the only way."

*Coro puts his fingers on his temples, and starts hacking into each of the ships with his technopathy. Soon, his mind is connected to all of their communications systems.*

Coro: (being broadcasted throughout each of the ships) "ATTENTION ALL, ATTENTION! MY NAME IS CORO, AND I AM A GREAT BEING ABOARD THE SHIP OF MAKUTA YNOT."

Spotter: "Yes, he is."

Coro: (broadcasted) "YOU MUST PUT ASIDE YOUR DIFFERENCES AND FOCUS ON THE TRUE THREAT BELOW YOU. A DANGEROUS WIZARD NAMED MAZKERTIS IS ON A RAMPAGE IN AN ATTEMPT TO CHANGE THE HISTORY OF THE MULTIVERSE. EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR IS AT STAKE HERE. WILL YOU RISK IT FOR OLD, TIRED RIVALRIES? PLEASE, PUT ASIDE YOUR WEAPONS! YOU MUST JOIN FORCES TO FIGHT A MUTUAL ENEMY!"

*Once the message finishes, Coro collapses onto the floor, and falls unconscious, his mind slowly disconnecting from each ship*

*The Knights rush to him*

Cutter: "If this doesn't work, to heck with the lot of them. Let them destroy each other, Ynot."

*For a second, Ynot sees a ghost-like version of himself walking around.*

--

<Saskana, surface>

*Perseus gives Strika a thumbs up, even as the water is pouring into the ship. He attempts to raise them out of the water using the Red Lantern construct, but he is immediately stopped.*

*Something appears to be pulling them to the surface. The ship slowly seems to be repairing itself, and time seems to be...in reverse? Strika and Perseus still remember what had happened earlier, but now they were in the same spot they were a minute ago*

Perseus: "WHAT?!"

*Mazkertis appears in front of the falling ship, and pulls Strika and Perseus out of it*

Mazkertis: (tp) "Be gone. I have no quarrel with you."

---

<Malchior IV>

*Rainn looks suspiciously at the woman. He leans in closer to her*

Rainn: "How do I know it's you?"

---

<The Bat-Cave>

Rahn: "Why does she think we're related? And why did she think I was a woman?"

---

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*President Howard laughs*

President Howard: "Oh come on, now you're just teasing me! This is obviously fake. Senator Vazquez just isn't the type."

OOS: Waiting on Nif and Kon for Meme World

<The Bahamut, Space Near Saskana>

Upon seeing the Pale Fire descend from the sky, Malygos's eyes widen.  Blackout?  Here?  That damnable Makuta should know better than to stick his nose into the business of the Dominion, and yet here his meddlesome taunts continue.  This was an insult to Malygos's honor and the might of the Dominion, and thus must be met.

Malygos's face appeared on Blackout's display, their mouth curling into a sneer.  "Well, well, Blackout, such a pleasure it is to see you here.  The ZFT's protection means little when these lowlives insist on continuing to fly the Imperial Star on their ships - that they stole, in case you forgot.  And to add insult to injury, they refuse the release of Dominion citizens back to their homes.  And if you insist on getting in-"

Then, the voice rang out.

Mazkertis?  Here?  Of course; how appropriate for a snake to hide amongst other snakes.  "Oh?  Very well.  I suppose that some snakes will have to lie where they remain for some time."  Malygos opened another channel, linking all the ships together in communication.  "Ynot, I know you to be an honest one, if a fool at times.  If you truly believe Mazkertis is down here, then I will help you track him down.  Assuming that Blackout doesn't use this as an opportunity to strike at me."  They glanced meaningfully at the Pale Fire.

----

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Sachiel looked his visitor up and down, his eyes suddenly widening in recognition.  "The famed pirate lord Fourteen?  Here?  But why - what would cause you to seek treatment in the slums here, rather than in the high life up in the big city?  It's not like you couldn't afford it."  He pushed up his glasses, his mouth twitching into a shrewd smirk.  "Unless...you have some reason that you want this kept quiet?  How fascinating - you must regale me with the details."

Normally, Sachiel would not ask such questions - but such a high profile customer simply asked too many questions.  And besides.  Sachiel hated pirates.  Damn criminals strutting around like they own the damn place.  They're half the reason he had to open this clinic.

---

<Mordor>

Hassan leapt backwards, pulling two conealed daggers from her cloak and flinging them at IG-88's fragile joints.

---

<The Zodiark>

Eos paced impatiently on board his personal vessel.  This was taking far too damn long - Figlio needed to be out of this prison before either the Dominion or HYDRA came with a larger force, and he lost the credit for the rescue.  Which he damn needed to, after tripping those alarms to ensure Figlio's party would fail on its own.

"This is tedious.  Helmsman, you have the bridge.  I will be heading down to aid my agent."

"Yes, sir."

Eos stepped off the bridge, his cape trailing behind him.

<Malchior IV, MacDaniel>

"I'm Captain Eurobeat. This is my assistant, Leslie. We're here for... Project D."

Dries nodded curtly, and lead them to the back of the restaurant. They entered through a door to a room behind the kitchen - small, dimly lit, but good enough. Three men were sat around a small table, a map pulled between them. Eurobeat wasted no time in pulling out a seat, and sitting on it.

"I'm glad you could make it." said Damian Lewis.

"It was no problem at all." replied Captain Eurobeat. Damian pointed to the map, which had two chess pieces placed on it. Captain Eurobeat quickly realized it was a map of the known universe - or, at least, a horizontal slice of it.

"We'll cut to the chase." said Damian, pointing to the map. "We've-"

"Actually," replied Captain Eurobeat, "I was wondering if you could help me first. A little favor, as I came all this way for you."

"Oh - Of course." replied Damian.

"I'm sorry to be so curt. But this pressure has been eating away at me ever since I first felt the pull of this planet's gravity. Have you felt it too?"

Damian stood up, and circled the table towards Captain Eurobeat. He gently placed his thumbs on his forehead, and winced.

"Pressure!" he replied.

"I feel it may be the kind of individual who is an impediment to our goals. Do you think it might be one of our enemies?"

Damian removed his thumbs, and return to his chair, drowsy for the experience. "I don't feel that it's Blackout, or Malygos. I also don't believe it's Mazkertis."

"Could it be Gabriel Ascheron?" asked Leslie. Captain Eurobeat tutted.

"No." replied Damian. "This pressure... I'm certain it's a woman."

"Then I have no idea who it could be... but still, this nostalgic pressure..."

"Still, we have more pressing issues." he said, pointing to the map again. "This is the location of the ship Bahamut. We're not certain, but we believe it to be the vessel of Malygos. We also believe that Blackout might be there, though we know nothing more than that."

"They're enemies." replied Eurobeat. "We don't need to worry about them at the moment. They'll deal with eachother."

Damian Lewis nodded. "However, we also believe that Mazkertis might there."

"I... don't know who that is."

"That's not important. What's important is that he's incredibly powerful, and seemingly hellbent on destroying our universe."

Eurobeat tutted. "That's not acceptable. I'll head there right now." he replied, standing up.

"Don't try anything stupid, Eurobeat. He's infinitely stronger than you. Even the nukes on the Night of Fire would probably have a hard time putting a scratch in him."

"Damian - I have never, ever done anything stupid."

---

<The Assault Shadow>

Ascheron exited the meeting room with a stack of papers held under his arm, storming towards the elevator. Altian followed suit, hurrying up to his Lord. He managed to slide in just as the doors closed; Ascheron paid him no regard.

"My Lord - if I may..."

"Go on."

"It's not my place to say, I understand, but I feel it must be said. The generals are suspicious of you."

"Oh?"

"Specifically... suspicious of you, and the woman you've been seen with."

Ascheron stepped forwards, and pressed the elevator control panel. The car slid to a stop. "Go on."

"My Lord - the Republic has changed significantly over the past few days, and there are those who feel she may have had too much of a say. They worry an outsider might be influencing the course of Lurian history. Even before Guf, she was allowed free passage of the ship - she was present in important meetings as an observer, and on the bridge at critical moments. They don't understand, or even know, who she is. My Lord - even I do not."

"Her name is Sefer Yetzirah. She's a core component of my script, and the leader of an organization known as the Shinsengumi. We'll need her to activate the Fruit of Knowledge."

"Is she an ally?"

"She's an asset. But she has made herself very useful to our efforts." replied Ascheron, pulling a folder out from under his arm and handing it to Altian. He gently opened it, and scanned it. His eyes shot open.

"She... designed all this?"

"Designed, or stole, I do not know. But the contents of that folder shall shape the face of the Lurian Fleet reorganization project."

Altian looked down in amazement. Every page seemed to reveal a technology he thought not possible. Mass-Production Icarus Weapons, City-Scale Replicators, Instantaneous Transmission Rings, Infinity Drives. These were only a few of the technologies that would ensure Lurian supremacy in the coming centuries.

"I dread to think what price was paid for all this..."

"It was a gift."

"My - My Lord?"

"For now, it's in her interest to support us. We have many goals in common. But after we have achieved those goals... she may well become the biggest threat Luria will ever face."

The elevator resumed, and the doors opened. Ascheron stepped out.

"I hope that answers all your questions, Altian."

<Tievie>

The planet of Tievie, like the others around it, was approximately Pluto-sized and encased in a thick layer of entwining black and green technology that could be seen from space. Rumours are that this cluster of planets used to be home to a civilization of artists, activists and comedians, but they were all overrun and assimilated by the Borg millennia ago. Every world in the Fortune system, each of them bristling with life, was stamped and converted into a kind of planet-sized machine that the Borg could use to further their efforts of expansion. One was once home to an army of Borg drones and another a repository for cube-ships; but the Borg who resided in this system are no more. In response to the growing threat that the Borg posed to nearby systems, an alliance of alien races relentlessly attacked the Borg-converted Fortune system with everything they had. The battle lasted for weeks and ended only when the Borg had no more cubes to spare. The alliance emerged victorious, but it was not long before greed and politics triggered a new war and the former allies left the Fortune system to battle each other across the galaxy. Tievie and its sister worlds were left abandoned, devoid of life, but much of the technology that the Borg had built remained. A human exploration team discovered the infrastructure of an incredibly advanced telepathic network that spanned the Tievie, designed to link Borg drones into the collective and help coordinate attacks on other worlds. These humans established a colony on Tievie to research the telepathic network and explore potential military applications for the technology.

Tievie's latest colonist from Earth, a rather unassuming young man, dipped into the atmosphere of the bleak world in a streamlined but relatively cheap Actis-class interceptor ship. As he manoeuvred his ship around the vast Borg antennae and datacentres that touched the sky, he received an automated signal from a relay station nearby.

"Welcome to Tievie, traveller," the artificial intelligence spoke. "Make sure to read the global rules that are being transmitted to your computer before docking. Please disable manual control so our automated flight system can guide your ship to Hangar Bay 34X-25."

The human did as he was told and disabled manual control, allowing the AI to take his ship on a new course. In the next few minutes, he saw '34X-25' in huge neon text scroll across his heads-up display as his ship flew into a dark building on the surface, lit only by trials of neon green energy that seeped through the walls. As his ship landed in the hangar and an airtight forcefield phased into existence behind him, he pressed the button to release his cockpit and retrieved a briefcase. A troupe of humans who seemed otherwise ordinary save for various cranial bio-augmentations stood waiting for him, weapons at the ready. The man jumped onto the ground and approached them with confidence, holding the briefcase out in front of him. The apparent leader of the group, an older-looking pale man, stepped forward and took the briefcase. As the newcomer awkwardly smiled to the others, the leader opened the briefcase and found that it contained exactly what he expected: adequate payment in credits. "So, what brings you here?" the leader asked.

"Memes," the newcomer replied.

"Then why bother coming here?" the leader reacted with confusion. "The internet on Earth should suffice."

"Earth is not enough. Tievie is the future."

The leader smiled and turned around, gesturing the newcomer to follow him. He was led away from the hangar, down a series of pipe-filled corridors and to a surgical room where the leader claimed that the "augmentations necessary to connect them to the network" would be surgically implanted. The operation was quick and painless, lasting less than a minute, but beyond that point there was no turning back. The newcomer was given a cube-shaped room all to himself, complete with a bed, replicator, television and several empty bottles, and of course unlimited network access. Forgoing the notion of sleep, the man plugged himself in with no intention to return to the world he left behind.

----------------------------------

<Earth, New York Police Department>

*A police officer's lunch break is interrupted by an incoming call*

*He audibly sighs as he answers it, taking a swig of coffee*

Policeman: Hello?

???: I think I know what happened to those $200,000!

Policeman: What $200,000?

???: Doug Walker's!

*The Policeman nearly chokes in surprise*

Policeman: You do? At least $10 of that is mine, I donated to that campaign!

???: Well I'm glad I didn't donate, but I did see Walker on the same day that he received the funds in physical form.

*The Policeman balances his phone on his shoulder as he opens up a blank text document on his computer and prepares to type*

Policeman: Go on...

???: I was walking down Wall Street. It was raining, and kinda cloudy, but I recognized Walker's face instantly when he passed me. Thinking I could make a quick buck from his signature or something, I turned and followed him. After he walked ten metres or so, I saw him take out a briefcase. I guess he must have been keeping it dry inside his coat. Walker went up to this other guy, handed him the briefcase, then bam! The other guy knocked him out cold with a punch to the face! As I looked on in shock, I saw him smile at me. Then he ran away.

Policeman: Could you give me a description of his face?

???: I don't need to. I recognized him. His face was everywhere on the local news for stealing another set of money. He's Wall Street's bad boy. Ross Mandell.

*The policeman finishes typing up the report and wipes the sweat off his brow*

Policeman: Jeez. Ross Mandell. He's supposed to be in prison right now, but we have no idea where he is.

???: I do. See, I wasn't gonna let another celebrity get away that easily. I stepped over Walker's unconscious body and chased Mandell down the street. He went straight to an airport and filed a flight plan with a local tough guy who promised to take him somewhere called the "Stouttish Islands".

Policeman: So what, you stalk celebrities for a living? Maybe I should trace this call. Heh, just ki-

???: Bye!

*The man hangs up*

*The policeman cringes at his mistake and stands up to address his coworkers*

Policeman: Attention, everyone! I've got an anonymous tip on Ross Mandell's whereabouts, and he's got Doug Walker's stolen $200,000! Anyone know where in the hell the "Stouttish Islands" are?

???: Yeah, Taylor Swift lives there!

*The Policeman gives his coworker a disapproving look as the precinct captain walks in*

Captain: What's going on here?

*The policeman gives the chief a quick rundown*

Captain: Alright, well, let's get a team together and move out at 0800. That money isn't gonna retrieve itself.

???: Sir, it's... a very long way away. At the other side of the universe.

Captain: ...Then I'll guess I'll have to call in some favors.

----------------------------------

<Meme World, surface>

The Cataractor: We start with that ship!

*He points to the horizon, over the hills, where a white Daedalus-class ship can be faintly seen*

Bateman: How in the hell did you see that?

Cataractor: Magic.

*The Cataractor snorts and walks away, much to the others' bewilderment*

Bateman: I say we get moving. I feel like I haven't stretched my legs since Tybion!

*Bateman starts jogging towards the ship, so the others follow him*

*As they get closer, they notice that, though the ship is on its side, it does not appear to be damaged in any way: in fact, the ground it is settled on appears to be incredibly soft, like a giant pillow, which might have cushioned its fall*

Carrots: This place never ceases to amaze me.

*A hatch on the bottom of the ship opens and many Terugans wearing black and grey ZFT uniforms bail out*

*They land on Meme World's cushion-y surface, but because of how bouncy it is, it takes them a few minutes to make their way over to the joke characters*

*Eventually, a skinny, pale-skinned Terugan reaches them*

???: By the iris! Who are you?

CIA: Dr. Cyclops, I'm CIA.

???: I'm Terugan, jackass.

Carrots: Is that not technically the same thing?

???: I'm cyclopean, not a cyclops!

Hungry-man: jus F#ck tell us what 'appened or i swear i'll 'ave yer leg fer dins

???: We were just sitting in our ship, which was in the hangar of this bigger ship that belongs to the "Cooperative" or something. We were travelling through space, then suddenly we get shaken all over the place and find ourselves falling towards the ground of this weird world. That good enough for you, fatty?

Hungry-man: u fukin wot? say tht again bender

??? Fatty fat fat fat!

*Hungry-man's skin turns a deeper shade of red, and he starts vibrating uncontrollably. Carrots grabs Car Guard and CIA, pushing them to the ground before hell can be unleashed*

Hungry-man: CCCCCCCOOOOOOOOORRRRRRR

*Hungry-man positions his hands above his pockets; tens of metal knives and forks fly from his pockets into his grip*

Hungry: BLLIIIIIIMMEEEEYYYYYYY

*With the speed of a thousand TMVs, Hungry-man throws the cutlery at the Terugan ensign. He is impaled hundreds of times and falls over, dead*

Bateman: I like your style!

Carrots: Dear God, you killed him! You killed the poor man!

Hungry-man: I'M VERY HOONGREHHH

Carrots: No... no... NOOOOOO!

*Hungry-man whacks Carrots' sword out of his grip, feverishly grabs his arm, and proceeds to bite it clean off*

----------------------------------

<The Mask's reality>

Harkinian and the Memes Kid looked on in horror, knowing that BONES and Wiseau's battle was one that must be fought to the death. Already, BONES was running out of bones to club Tommy with, and he knew it all too well. Still, he remained on equal footing with his opponent, as Tommy was scared of skeletons, a fear which made him hold back more than he usually would.

"Die, die, die!!" Tommy screamed, while backing up the volcano and generating bombs to throw at BONES while doing so. BONES either dodged them or deflected them with ease, causing them to roll down the volcano and explode elsewhere.

"I'm already dead!" BONES cackled, as he pushed Tommy even further up the volcano with his offensive. Soon, they would both be at the top, faced with a bubbling pool of lava. "You know, that black suit really doesn't suit you. You'd look better in your... DEATHDAY suit, myaaah!"

"Go away, get out of here, get out of my life!!" Tommy cried, as he generated an oversized green mallet and attempted to smash BONES with it. BONES rolled out of the way, but his right arm was caught under the mallet and broke off from his torso. Unfazed, BONES simply picked up his right arm with his left and proceeded to face-slap the hell out of Wiseau anyway. This continued for a minute or so, after which BONES tossed his arm over his shoulder and grabbed Wiseau by the throat.

"I'm tired of playing games," BONES rumbled. "That mask is mine!"

"F...ck you, mudderf...ahck...a..." Tommy choked, and used the power of the Mask to turn his own foot giant, which he then used to kick BONES in the crotch. Unsurprisingly, this did nothing, as whatever might have once been there was obviously long gone.

BONES' expression was hard to tell, what with his face being a skull and all, but his tone implied he was grimacing. "The feeling is mutual," BONES said. He headbutted Wiseau, released him from his grip and made a final grab for the Mask.

----------------------------------

<Malchior IV, inside Lalli's ship>

*Vyrrh and Arkhite sleep on top of beds like humans would, but Ikhet falls asleep in a seated position with his legs crossed*

*Micros sleeps on top of Masaharu, who is curled up in a ball next to Muta*

*Muta literally folds into a sphere and shuts down to charge his power cells*

----------------------------------

<Quolas's fortress>

Quolas: No, no. But I might if I attempt to travel through time or space with so little energy left.

-----

Kakamu: Copy that.

*Kakamu notices a human man ahead of them; he is wearing a grey jumpsuit with this logo on the side of the chest*

*The man appears to be weeding a vegetable patch and listening to music on a radio*

Kakamu: We've got company.

*Kakamu shapeshifts himself to look like a human being - but the closest he can get to a humanoid shape is something like the Silver Surfer, but darker*

*Kakamu steps out of the foliage and towards the man*

*The man sees him, but gasps in terror*

Kakamu: Woah, woah, relax, fellow human! I'm... uh... Bob, from the... spaceship department. As you can see, I got covered in this silver paint while working on a starfighter! Ha ha. By the way, can you tell me what year it is?

OOS: Feel free to take it from here lolol.

----------------------------------

<Tunisia>

Dave: Sure!

*Dave puts his AK-47 into a holster strapped to his horse*

Mike: Daaaaave, what the hell are you doing?! Some random purple alien literally appears in the middle of nowhere, says he has to save the universe, and you believe him just like that?

Dave: Sure. Stranger things have happened.

Mike: Um, no they haven't! I know we've been through some weeeeird s**t, but this one takes the cake.

Dave: Hey, don't talk about cake, man. We're in the middle of the desert.

Mike: Ugh.

*Mike lowers his weapon*

Mike: Alright, get up. Just don't try anything funny.

----------------------------------

<Stelta-Stal>

Xikila: Unfortunately, I lack such insight, my lord.

*Xikila uses her magnetism power to cause Ricochet to roll towards her*

*As the magnetic force becomes stronger, he flies into her, so she catches him like a basketball*

*Xikila then forcibly bends him back into a humanoid shape*

Xikila: Such a silly injury for a Makuta such as you. So stupid.

----------------------------------

<Malcolm's ship>

Linkara: I'll do as I please!

*Linkara does the opening movements of the Supervillain Shuffle, which causes Seran to cover his eyes in horror*

Paul Latza: Does this mean I can join ChannelAwesome now?

----------------------------------

<Atuar Sadiares>

A mysterious figure wandered through the crowds of one of Atuar Sadiares's many shopping malls. Though her weaponry has been confiscated at a checkpoint upon arrival, she appeared no less intimidating, retaining her battle-scarred body armor, grey camo gear and heavy leather boots. In addition to this, she was blindfolded with a yellow ribbon (which contrasted heavily with her purple skin), yet she seemed to have as much spacial awareness and sense of direction as anyone. It was rush hour, so she passed by hundreds, perhaps thousands of people as she ventured deeper into the arcade. She found herself almost overwhelmed with smells and chatter she never could have imagined back on Teruga Prime and took a moment to bask in the unfamiliarity. Unfortunately, this momentary loss of concentration caused her to be rudely pushed aside by a large, brutish alien who smelled like Axe deodorant. She fell over, not anticipating the collision, but she was on her feet again within seconds. She looked for the alien, but he was already gone. He was replaced by the presence of two new scents, with the scent of the crowd of people now behind her.

This must mean I'm in a shop, she thought. I wonder if they have any guns.

OOS: DRJ, that's your cue.

----------------------------------

OOS: Waiting on Red and Paws for Archon-7.

<Saskana>

TPK: Coro, if he were killing everyone down there, the fighters wouldn't be bothering us. *to himself* What a trainwreck.

*Ynot stares at the ghost until it disappears*

Ynot: Kurenitsu, was that you?

Kurenitsu: What?

Ynot: No, never mind.

*He answers Malygos' message*

Ynot: I know he's down there. How can you help me?


*When Malygos' face appears on the display, Blackout becomes noticeably muted*

Blackout: You. Malygos, if it bothers you so much, just ask them to change the emblem. Not fly a damn warship into their system.

*Blackout hears Coro's message, and sighs*

Blackout: Seems like there's nothing but mutual enemies lately. Very well, Malygos, Ynot. We will join together. I just need to make a few calls.

*He disconnects, and immediately sends a message to Von Budberg*

Blackout: Greetings. I'm afraid I have bad news for you.

Von Budberg: I do not zee how it could be any vhorse zhan is already! I think somebody izzz trying to kill me and my guest!

Blackout: It wouldn't be a wizard by the name of Mazkertis, would it, your excellency?

Von Budberg: Vhat? Nein! Massskertis actually Asved me from them!

Blackout: What are you trying to say? What's he doing?

Von Budberg: He came here vhith the Cybertron strike force, and then he saved me from zhe assassins!

*Blackout puts his head in his hands*

Blackout: You idiot.

---

*Von Budberg walks up to the pilot*

Von Budberg: I do believe vee are being desheived, mein freund.


Strika: Um, well, you actually murdered most of my friends, so I have plenty of quarrel with you.

*Suddenly, the gunship opens fire on Mazkertis*

-----

<Mordor>

*Black Phantom calmly swings his mace at Figlio's head*


*IG-88 manages to avoid one dagger, but the other sinks into his shoulder*

IG-88: Accurses!

*He fires eye-beams at Hassan while he tries to get the dagger out*

-----

<Malchior IV>

*Aster shrugs*

Aster: Before you entered my mind, I saw snow. Lots of snow. How's that?

-----

<The Bat-Cave>

F-Blackout: I don't know. Humans are strange. So, is there a training room here?

SB: I don't know.

F-Blackout: You've lived here for a year! What do you do in your spare time, then?

553: Usually, we just watch TV.

F-Blackout: That explains a lot.

-----

<Atuar Sadiares>

*In the shop, a man and a woman appear to be arguing*

*The woman looks something like this*

Nikolai: How in God's name can we be making a loss? Aliens love Russian food!

Amy: Maybe because you keep giving discounts to girls you like?

Nikolai: I do not do that!

*Amy just stares at him*

Nikolai: Okay, maybe I shaved a few credits off the price of soured milk while in the presence of a particularly pretty girl, but it's nothing you haven't done!

Amy: Oh, you are so not making this about me!

*They then notice the Terugan*

Amy: Oh, I didn't notice you were there! Sorry, um, ma'am? *to herself* I can never tell with Terugans..... *loudly again* So, can we help you with anything?

-----

<Stelta-Stal>

*Ricochet slowly unfolds his limbs*

Ricochet: Oh.....oh, that feels nice. Can we just stick to teleporting for a while? I don't think I'll be able to stand for days.

-----

<Malchior IV, Senate>

Alan: That's probably what he'd like you to believe. It's certainly what he'd like his constituents to believe, and definitely what he'd like his primary voters to believe. Was that what your plan? Release it in the middle of the primaries, force him to withdraw, and throw the nomination to that damn Weir woman? Don't get me wrong, I'd love to see her go down in flames, but not like this, you know?

*He tidies up the papers*

Alan: Brace yourself, Mr. President, because Congress is going to tear you apart.

*He hands the President a textbook with a bookmark poking out of it*

*If he opens it, he will find that the page marked is Chapter 7, "An Overview of the Impeachment Process"*

<Malchior IV, MacDaniel>

Dreis enters the main restaurant again, moving back toward his Big Dan burger. He makes it halfway across the floor before spotting poster girl. Dreis stops, slicks back his hair with one hand, and leans against a booth, cocking a revolver with one finger but leaving it in its holster.

"Jesus, what is this? Grand Central Station? Who the hell are you? Girl scouts?"

------------------------------

<Atuar Sadiares, Nickolai/Amy's Shop>

"Hey hey! Watch the little lady pal! Watcha think you're doing?"  

Ray stepped up to the alien. It stood a good three feet taller than him making it nearly 9 feet tall, and was wearing a thick suit of black armour, a stark contrast to Ray's loose white t-shirt, red bomber jacket and backwards cap. Ray also sported high waisted jeans and black and white sneakers. His blonde hair fell halfway down his back, and hung in arched bangs over his forehead. He was visibly fit, with a strong upper body.

???: Back off Human dung, less you want yer face caved in.

Ray: Woah Woah buddy; I wouldn't try that here. They take weapons away for a reason and the reason's so their armed police can shoot dead punks like you. Apologise to- [turning to Mysterious Woman] sorry I didn't catch your name..."

OOS: Scald me if I'm doing stuff wrong

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Fourteen: "It's not a secret, I just had a bloody entity try to enter my mind. And I had a lot to drink when I came back."

---

<Mordor>

*Figlio blocks the mace with his sword*

Figlio: "Why kill me?"

---

<Meme World, surface>

Medic: "AGH! He has gone insane!"

Pootis-Man: "Ooh nooo!"

*The joke characters start running away from Hungry-Man. Hide-The-Pain Harold walks up to the ravenous lad to calm him down*

Harold: "There is no need to be upset."

---

<The Mask's reality>

*The Memes Kid was over the edge of his seat, as he was sitting in a chair that wasn't there before). King Harkinian was shocked by the vicious battle before him. The Alien took pictures for more ebin memes, and LeTrole Rusemann simply laughed. The Heckler was disgusted by BONES and Wiseau, as they both exuded the thing he abhorred the most: hecks.*

---

<Malchior IV, inside Lalli's ship>

*Klak lays his head down on a nearby rock, and begins to ponder life*

---

<Quolas' fortress>

Bob: "Oh no, that's too risky."

---

???: "Woah, hey guy. Welcome to 1985."

*Nadle widens his eyes as he hides in a nearby bush*

---

<Tunisia>

D-Klak: "You mean I can't tell jokes? *He winks, puts away his gunblade, and gets up* We're still in 2015 AD correct? I know the calender's different in space but I just wanted to check."

---

<Stelta-Stal>

Caiaphus: "Absolutely, Ricochet. We must sharpen our skills, and work in the darkness. That was my intention before the attack. We cannot let Blackout spot us again, or else the Brotherhood will be fully disbanded."

---

<Malcolm's ship>

Doug: "Someday. Anyway, where should we go after this?"

Linkara: "Comic-Con?"

JC Denton: "The doctor?"

Dr. Bedge: "Alasaska?"

Dr. Pavel: "The humble abode of Hee Yunglings?"

---

<Saskana>

*Mazkertis hears the firing of the cannon, and flies away from the laser blast. He angrily grunts*

Mazkertis: (tp to all, including Von Budberg) "Traitors!"

*Mazkertis throws Strika and Perseus at Von Budberg's ship, and flies towards the spires. He thinks to himself that all those attacking him are foolish, as he is trying to fix them, and to fix their universe. He angrily moves his fists, and turns around.*

*Perseus uses his ring to prevent himself from crashing into Budberg's ship. He creates an orb for Strika*

Perseus: "Crazy wizard!"

*Mazkertis fires volleys of green magic at his enemies in an attempt to absorb their life force from far away*

--

<Cabana Prime, Near Saskana>

D-Klak (4): "Tell them to get a move on."

*Coro is still unconscious*

*Suddenly, they all feel something coming from Saskana's surface*

Axalara: "What the...?"

D-Klak (4): "A disturbance in the Force."

---

<Malchior IV>

*Rainn's eyes narrow. He stares at Aster suspiciously*

Rainn: "Sure. Let's get going."

---

<The Bat-Cave>

Rahn: "Train? It's nighttime! Why would we train? I haven't gotten a proper amount of sleep!"

*Julio falls asleep*

*Anarky rolls his eyes*

---

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*President Howard reads the page, and smiles. He stands up.*

Pres. Howard: "With the Liberal Party in majority, I know the odds aren't in your favor."

*He holds out his hand to shake Skedaddle's*

Pres. Howard: "Game on, Senator."

---

<Malchior IV, MacDaniel>

Girl: "I am not a girl scout! I'm only here to speak to you about HYDRA, an organization for change!!"

---

OOS: Hope I'm not missing anyone!

<The Assault Shadow>

In the near-weightless environment of the ship's FTL configuration, Sefer drifted effortlessly onto the bridge, stopping herself by pressing a hand against the back of Ascheron's command throne. She spun around the side of it to face Ascheron.

"I'm leaving."

"Oh?"

She ran a finger through her hair. "I don't have any real wish to be part of this battle. I'm going back to the Shinsengumi."

"What about the Fruit of Knowledge?"

"It's not ready to be used yet." she replied, kicking gently off the chair. "I'll come back when it is."

"How do I know you'll keep your word?"

"You don't."

With that, Sefer disappeared in a burst of light. Altian looked stunned.

"Did she... teleport out whilst we were at warp?"

Ascheron nodded. As he did, the Assault Shadow exited warp above its location, Saskana. She made a low pass over the Bahamut before retreating to a high orbit, just beyond combat range of the Dominion fleet. Whilst the Bahamut triumphed in sheer bulk, the Assault Shadow took the edge in length. In terms layout, it resembled a legless scorpion with its tail laid out straight behind it - but in reverse, with the two engines where the claws would be, and the stinger forming the prow of the ship. The bridge was in a raised tower located above the central hull to the rear of the ship. It possessed a healthy amount of cannons mounted across the hull, as well as a mass-accelerator cannon running through the length of the ship, protruding from the prow.

"Monitor the situation from here." replied Ascheron, standing up from his throne. "We don't want to be drawn into a three-way fight, but if there's an opportunity to take out one of our enemies at this stage of the script, then we should take it. Keep the MAC at full charge."

"Yes, My Lord." replied one of the bridge officers, sitting down on Ascheron's throne as she assumed command of the bridge. Ascheron turned and left, as gravity gradually returned to the ship.

---

Sefer materialized aboard the Kusanagi. The interior of the ship resembled a Japanese temple, down to the faux paper walls, and slide doors. She was in her quarters, which were very minimalistic, with little furniture other than a floor mat and a small table with cushions. She walked towards the exit, the door automatically opening as she did. A girl stood outside, leaning against the wall.

"Yetzirah-Sama!" she exclaimed, bowing. Sefer smirked.

"Zero's not around. There's no need for the theatrics." she replied, jokingly.

Lilith chuckled. "How's the situation with Ascheron?" she asked, as they began walking down the corridor.

"He's not an issue. He doesn't know what the Fruit does, let alone how to activate it."

"And the Republic's going to take care of our issues?"

"They'll certainly try." she replied, grinning. they turned a corner, and came to a large doorway, which they entered. Inside, a man stood. He was young, with long, black hair, and an eye-patch. He wore black samurai robes and carried a Katana. He bowed respectfully as Sefer entered, and turned to the side, revealing the apple behind him, which was placed upon a stand. Sefer stepped forwards, and took hold of it.

"What Ascheron doesn't understand is that the Fruit of Knowledge is useless without its brother. Fortunately, the Fruit of Life is not so situational."

Sefer threw the Fruit in the air, and an entirely different hand caught it. A being had materialized next to her, hovering centimeters off the ground. It was humanoid, with a robotic appearance; jagged segments of silver metal covered its body, which was completely black, though this was barely noticable due to the sheer amount of armor on it. Orange lights shot out here and there, and its face was featureless save for four orange lights forming eyes, arranged in an X formation. Its arms ended in huge, terrible claws, and from the interior of one of these shot forth a black hand, which held the apple.

~~~

Space Pirate Captain Eurobeat turned to the camera, and began to speak.

"The being is Cruel Angel's Thesis, the Stand of Sefer Yetzirah. It is, like the other Stands of the Shinsengumi, a result of the Fruit of Life's passive effects. The Fruit contains within it every possible life form that exists, has existed and could exist; touching the Fruit confers one of these possibilities, at random, on the user of the Fruit, as a summon-able familiar. Stands possess no mind or personality of their own, and instead follow the user's instructions, spoken or otherwise. They can be anything from humanoids to sentient weapons or vehicles, and each one possesses a unique power, often, related to its name, which is predetermined at the point their master gains control of them. Unlike conventional names, the names of Stands are barely recognizable as them; as such, Sefer's stand is known as Cruel Angel's Thesis, Lilith Heyerdahl's is known as Only My Railgun, and Original Zero's is known as Two Heavens as One. Their most important feature, however, is that Stands cannot be killed independent of their wielder - but a fraction of the damage dealt to a Stand is taken by said wielder.

However, touching the Fruit is not the only way to gain a Stand. With knowledge of the Fruit's existence, anyone may meditate and, with enough passion, gain a Stand. In addition, Stands may simply materialize under the control of random individuals - a result of the Fruit's wide-reaching sphere of influence. What this means for the universe and the destinies of those fighting within is currently unknown, but as they hurtle towards fate, they will surely discover-"

"What the hell are you on about?" asked Leslie.

Captain Eurobeat grinned. "It's called exposition. Oh, you wouldn't understand." he said, turning to Dreis and whispering in his ears; "HYDRA are bad guys, by the way. Anyway, have fun!"

Lelsie and Captain Eurobeat turned and left MacDaniel.

OOS: Feel free to give your characters Stands! Name them after songs, books, turns of phrase or quotes and stuff. The more ridiculous awkward they are to type, the better. I'll put a cool guide up on their wiki page later.

EDIT: Here's the page!

<Atuar Sadiares>

The Terugan looked between Amy and Ray, unsure of what to do. She was already far out of her comfort zone by being in close proximity to so many people, but she knew that coming to Atuar Sadiares would be the stepping stone to far greater places than her war-torn homeworld. She took a few moments to suppress the panic rising inside her, then turned to Ray and smiled.

"Thank," she said, with a slight stutter. She walked over to Ray and patted him on the head: a strange way of expressing her gratitude. Next, the Terugan turned to Amy and approached the counter. "Am looking for ship. Superiors... dead. Am free now."

She then pointed to the side of her head. "Telepathic link severed. No more orders... so far."

------------------------------

<Stelta-Stal>

Xikila: Yes... our legion must be rebuilt.

*Xikila walks into the room where most of the Battle of Stelta-Stal took place and raises her hands in the air*

*Purple light shines from her palms over the damaged Rahkshi parts and antidermis fragments, which begin to shake and connect to each other*

Xikila: It must be reinforced.

*Several burned Rahkshi torsos connect together and smaller parts are drawn to them*

*Feet become toes and hands become fingers as Xikila's colossal creation comes together*

*Both living and dead Kraata are merged together to form a fork-tongued, lizard-like creature that is placed in the head of the behemoth*

*When all the spare antidermis in the room has been incorporated into the creature, it stands complete and gives a mighty roar*

Xikila: The Rahkshi-Nui will help with that.

------------------------------

<Quolas's fortress>

Quolas: Indeed.

-----

Kakamu: Uh... could you be more specific?

Guy: January 23rd, of course!

Kakamu: Alright, thanks. Have a good one.

Guy: Copy that.

*Kakamu walks back over to Nadle, so the man goes back to work*

Kakamu: That went surprisingly well...

*Kakamu walks back inside the fortress to where Quolas and Bob are sitting*

Kakamu: January 23rd, 1985.

Quolas: You're sure?

Kakamu: Positive.

Quolas: So be it.

*Quolas draws his sword and cuts a spatial tear in the middle of the room, which he then steps into*

------------------------------

<The Forest of Lights>

A spacial tear appeared in the infinite expanse and a tired looking-Quolas stepped out. The tear soon behind him and he fell asleep as he floated further into the realm. There were no Living Stars here anymore: the only lights on the horizon now were artificial balls of energy that were left to illuminate the realm in their absence. The direction Quolas was floating in caused him to come into contact with one of these balls, whose energy was transferred into his body upon being touched. Many hours passed as Quolas dreamed of a simpler time, long long ago, before his world was destroyed in a blinding supernova. Yes, he remembers... watching the eruption of his sun from the bed of grass on which he was sat that day. He remembers having to make a choice between the light and the darkness in those few seconds left alive. He chose the Eclipse.

Quolas awoke from his much-needed rest, finding himself wondering where his fellow guardians of time were. Perhaps they were still at the café on Nauru? It didn't seem much like Vexull to stay among humans for too long. Unlike Quolas, Vexull had a distrust of all things living, but they still got along somehow, and Quolas considered him a friend. The faces of Kakamu, Klak, Etende, and his newfound friends then rose to the forefront of his mind, reminding him to collect them from the past. Quolas created another tear with his sword and dove through.

------------------------------

<Quolas's fortress>

*A spatial tear appears only moments after Quolas had disappeared through the first one*

*Quolas rolls out of it and closes it behind him*

Quolas: I am rejuvenated. Let us gather the others and leave this place.

------------------------------

<Tunisia>

Mike: Uh, yeah! It's only January. The year's gotten off to a bad start for me too, but wishing it away don't make it so.

Dave: Gee, Mike, don't be such a downer. Lots of cool stuff has happened this year.

Mike: Yeah, like what?

Dave: Well there was that epic concert on Tybion, for starters! I couldn't make it myself, but I managed to catch a livestream. That alien army at the end was super realistic!

Mike: ...That wasn't part of the show, Dave. Remember all those people who went missing?

Dave: Uh...

Mike: Anyway, it was... Klak, right? What are you doing here? Did your UFO crash or something?

------------------------------

<Malcolm's ship>

Seran: Tatooeene?

Spanha: Splapp?

Spoony: A solicitor's office?

Paul Latza: Bronycon 2015?

*Everyone on the ship looks awkwardly at each other*

Seran: I want to get off thees wild ride!!

------------------------------

<Meme World, surface>

Carrots: Unhand me at once!

*Carrots punches Hungry-man with his free arm, but to no avail*

*Patrick Bateman puts on a raincoat and dances on the spot as carrot juice splashes over him*

CIA: No, this can't be happening! I'm in charge here!

*Unfortunately, CIA's power stance does nothing to stop Hungry-man from devouring poor Carrots*

*Once Hungry-man has finished, there is nothing left of the Scottish warrior*

Medic: Don't worry, he'll grow back!

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

"Oh, very well." Sachiel sighed. "Be seated," he said, and so Fourteen did. After a thorough examination, the doctor stood up. "Alcohol, sir? Really? So soon after a psychic injury? That's just asking for trouble." He sighed. "Unfortunately, I cannot help you permanently. I'm not a brain surgeon, and the issue with magical healing is it's not great at the fine points. Attempting anything with it right now might cause damage to the soft tissue. I can," he said, taking a bottle from his cabinet, "perscribe you this, which'll help with the headaches, but you may want to see a specialist, in case your psychic injury worsens."

---

<Mordor>

Hassan goes into a roll, throwing five more daggers to pin IG-88 to the wall. A grand arrow of light rushes down the corridor at blinding speed, piercing Phantom's side. At the end stood Eos, his golden cape and golden hair billowing behind him, his usually blue eyes turned gold with power. He brandished a bow of purest light, another arrow materializing in his hand. "You were taking too long," he said.

---

<The Bahamut, Over Saskana>
ally
Malygos cut the feed to Blackout. "Keep an eye out for any movement from their ship. More oft than not, these so-called team-ups end as an excuse for Blackout to get the other hand." They opened back up their feed to Ynot. At least this one had some sense of honor, backward and foolish as it was. "And when it comes to catching a wizard, who better than another?" He smirked.

A pause. Malygos's face fell, their eyes widening. "Oh no. Ynot, change of plans. We must locate him and dispatch of him immediately. If what i feel is correct, what he's doing..." Malygos shuddered. "We need to go down immediately."

The channel to Blackout opened again. "Do we have his coordinates?" they asked.

---

<Skies Above Linkit>

The planet was barren. Broken. A landscape fit not even to house a single cockroach. Once-grand lakes reduced to naught more than a single spring - and in other places, not even that. It was a wasteland. The brutal weaponry used by the Makuta was all too evident - naught would grow on a world exposed to the dark fire of the Makuta.

The Agrippa, a once proud and powerful race, ruling the seas with their ways of war and honor, reduced to a dying race, finding small caves that were spared the brutality that burned the rest of the world. Their once noble spirit reduced to ash.

Yet now, came hope for them. Word spread between the surviors, of another race, called the Sahagin, who would save them from doom. And the word was true - great ships shaped like fantastic beasts of the sea, descending upon their doomed world. The climate of the surface shifted, ash turned to dirt, and water that had evaporated condensed and became lakes. The barren world of Linkit, though not restored to its former glory, had been, over time, become habitable.

And so it was, when one of this new species, these called sahagin, moved to claim the world they'd restored. One came before the repairing Agrippa. He had that slimy, deep blue scales marking him as one of the Sahagin. His arms were long, his sharp claws webbed, built for an aquatic species. His head resembled nothing more than that of a snapping piranha. He wore a bright red sash, marking him as a diplomat, and a speaker.

"Sso..." he whispered, his voice hissing and strange. "We have terraformed your planet, and rendered it habitable again - it iss only thiss we ask as payment." He pointed. "The choice of our place to form a colony in the name of Lord Leviathan."

<Sapsa, Homeworld of the Sahagin>

The Kusanagi exited warp above the planet, its chemical thrusters already firing, slowing it down for an orbital descent. The planet below was covered almost entirely in water - blue as far as the eye could see, save for the occasional cloud, and the red glow of atmospheric friction as the hull of the Kusanagi cut through the upper atmosphere.

Lucy looked down on the surface from the observation room, extinguishing her cigarette against the window. Sighing, she got up, exiting the room. Kira was waiting outside, leaning against the wall. Lucy sighed. He was only wearing a third of his usual assortment of Katanas, but he still looked ridiculous with both of them on the same side.

"What is it with scrubs who have a thing for Sefer Yetzirah, and standing outside of doors waiting for people?"

"Actually," replied Kira, frowning, "Sefer's asked me to be part of her security detail during the negotiations."

Lucy shrugged, as the two began walking to the bridge. "Okay. That doesn't really answer the question though, does it? I mean - does Sefer exit doors often enough that it's a viable strategy to get hold of her? I'm fairly sure she teleports everywhere."

"I don't have a thing for Sefer, Lucy. I merely... admire her as a leader."

"And I'm not addicted to these things." she replied, drawing another cigarette from her jacket. Kira snatched the cigarette out of her hand, and threw it to the side.

"Those things are disgusting."

"What's that? Oh, of course. You wanna smell like roses for your date with your waifu, eh?"

"She's not my - what the heck does that even mean?"

"It means you're a scrub, dumb-ass."

The two exited onto the bridge, where Sefer, Zero and Lilith were waiting. Sefer was - as always - standing; she hated using the command throne. Instead, Zero occupied it, whilst Lilith leaned against the wall, gazing out of the view screen at the ocean's surface. Sefer turned her head as Lucy and Kira entered.

"What's the plan, boss?" asked Lucy. Kira grimaced. He hated Lucy's forward way of talking to their leader.

"I'd like to hold the negotiations on our ship." she replied, turning back to the viewscreen. "I'm hoping if we wait here long enough, someone'll come to investigate. I'd rather not submerge the Kusanagi - that takes us into their domain, and gives them the starting advantage on any talks we have."

"Naturally." replied Kira.

"Oh, Senpai~! You're such a genius, Sefer-Sama~!" replied Lucy, in a mocking town. Kira scowled.

"That's enough." replied Sefer, smirking. "Kira, come with me to the throne room. Zero - call us if there's any activity."

"Yes, my Lord." replied Zero, his sole eye remaining fixed on the viewscreen.

<Saskana>

*Blackout smirks, and replies*

Blackout: Yes, unless he's moved in the meantime. *He sends them to both ships* He's five miles off the energy spires. I think he wants to feed off of them. I recommend we meet him there.


Ynot: Very well. Let's teleport down there.

*He opens a portal, and TPK, the Anima, and hopefully D-Klak and the Knights step in*

*They end up on a tall platform near the spires, where Blackout, Starscream, Barricade, and Brawl are already waiting*

Blackout: Ynot, TPK, Malygos, and goddamn D-Klak. Why does the universe hate me?

Kurenitsu: I'm sure there are some good reasons. Where is this guy?

Starscream: I'm sure he's coming, dear lady.

---

*In her orb, Strika bounces off of the gunship*

*The hatch opens, and Von Budberg holds out his hand*

Von Budberg: Get in! Veee must get to zee spires!

*However, the gunship must then maneuver away from them to avoid the volleys of magic*

-----

<Mordor>

*IG-88 rips the dagger out of his shoulder, and opens fire on Hassan with a laser rifle*

*By pure chance, he manages to shoot one dagger out of the air, but and two miss, but the remaining two pin him to the walk*

*However, he keeps firing*


Black Phantom: You shall live, unless you continue to resist.

*He is about to swing the mace again, when the arrow of light hits him*

*He falls to the ground, but swiftly gets back up, seemingly oblivious to the new hole in his side*

BP: Error. New combatant detected.

*He fires two fireballs at Eos*


*Meanwhile, Straxus flings Turel off of him and into a wall*

Straxus: Why do you help these..... organics?

*His chest opens up, revealing a grenade launcher*

*He fires two grenades in rapid succession, one in the direction of Turel, and one in Hassan's*

-----

<Malchior IV>

Aster: C'mon. No time to waste.

*She leads him by the hand towards the escalator*

*Meanwhile, the shape-shifter pays for his coffee and leaves the cafe*

*He takes out a headset, and mutters some orders into it*

*While Aster and Rainn are going up the escalator, two other shape-shifters are going down*

*Aster notices them, and suddenly whips around and kisses Rainn*

*The shape-shifters look away*

-----

<Atuar Sadiares>

Amy: Um, ma'am? I think you got the wrong place.

Nikolai: We sell food here. Would you like some herring?

-----

<The Bat-Cave>

F-Blackout: Hm, good point. We'll train in the morning.

*He goes to bed*

-----

<Stelta-Stal>

*Ricochet looks up at the Rahkshi Nui in awe*

Ricochet: Oh, I like you, girl.

-----

<Malchior IV, Senate>

Alan: There are majorities, and then there are majorities, Mr. President. Your party will want to hold onto you, of course. At first. But then they'll think of their outraged constituents, of the media onslaught, of their future primary challengers. Quite a few may sympathise with Mr. Vazquez, if you catch my drift. *wink*

*He shakes Howard's hand*

Alan: Game on.

<Malchior IV, Cafe>

HYDRA Girl: "No, we are not!"

---

<Stelta-Stal>

*Caiaphus's eyes glow with excitement*

Caiaphus: "Yes.....our legion. Rise, Rahkshi-Nui. Kneel before your masters."

---

<Quolas' fortress>

*Nadle and Bob gather the humans*

Bob: "Darn, I wanted to stay and listen to all of the 80s music!"

Nadle: "Me too. We must save the universe first."

Bob: "Hmm....what do you think, Kakamu?"

---

<Tunisia>

D-Klak: "Teleportation, actually. I'll need some help getting back into space. I have to stop an evil wizard.....again....from rewriting history. What brings you two to Tunisia?"

---

<Malcolm's ship>

Linkara: "Actually, I think I know what we need to do."

*He is staring at the communications panel, which is broadcasting a hologram of a mean old man yelling at 90s Kid*

Malcolm: "Is that....90s Kid?!"

Dr. Bedge: "And an enemy I thought I'd never see again..."

Dr. Pavel: "Who?!"

Doug: "Some kind of Mean Old Man?"

Dr. Bedge: "Yes....Bring The Pain Barry."

OOS: DUN DUN DUN!!

---

<Meme World, surface>

Hide The Pain Harold: "Let him go. You aren't making me proud of you, Hungry-man!"

*The Kind Old Man frowns, and refuses to pat Hungry-Man on the back.*

Pootis-Man: "Pootis!"

---

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Fourteen: "Well, do you know any specialists? I can't run around with a bloody messed up brain."

---

<Mordor>

*Figlio nods at Eos*

Figlio: "I trust you will handle things."

*He seems to walk down the hallway, tapping his chin*

---

<Saskana>

*D-Klak (4) raises an eyebrow*

D-Klak (4): "Uhh, who are you again? I'm sorry, I'm not from this year."

Axalara: "That's Blackout. *to Blackout and the others* Your reputations precede you. I am Axalara."

*The other Knights introduce themselves*

D-Klak (4): "Alright, then. I left Coro on the ship. He'll need some time to rest."

--

*Perseus angrily controls Strika with his ring, setting her down inside of Von Budberg's ship. He flies towards Mazkertis, firing blasts of Red Lantern energy*

*Mazkertis absorbs the volleys of magic he shot at the others, and creates a shield that blocks Perseus's attacks. He flies up to the Toa, and dodges his punches. Mazkertis then kicks Perseus in the chest, and knocks him to the sea with a blast of sonic energy. He turns around, and floats towards the spires*

---

<Malchior IV, Spaceport(?)>

*Rainn's eyes widen, and he returns the kiss. As Aster stops, he blushes*

Rainn: "I...well.....why?!"

---

<The Bat-Cave>

*Rahn and the others go to bed*

---

<Malchior IV, Senate>

President Howard: "Alright, enough business! Josiah?"

*One of the Secret Service agents walks up to Skedaddle, and shakes his hand*

Agent Josiah: "Uhh, sir, my son asked me to get a Senator's autograph, would you mind signing?"

((He can sign the autograph if you want to, then there will be a time skip))

---

<Malchior IV, Klak's location>

*Klak spends the night looking at Spacechan on his phone. He goes through many threads discussing "degeneracy". He sees another set of threads claiming that the Great Beings are secretly in control of Malchior IV. He tried to prove one of these posters wrong, but they called him a "GBIDF shill" and a "Good Agori". He was confused by this, and decided to never browse Spacechan again.*

*Klak falls asleep, and soon, it is morning. He wakes up*

OOS: It's now morning for all Malchior plots on this side of the planet.

<Stelta-Stal>

*Xikila smiles upon seeing her creation and turns to Caiaphus*

Xikila: Do you still wish to attack the Vrai colonies?

---------------------------------

<Atuar Sadiares>

*The Terugan beams upon hearing the word "food"*

???: Yes!

*She fumbles around in her cargo pants, eventually finding a nondescript credit card, which she hands to Amy*

*She then puts her hand around Ray and gives him a toothy grin*

???: Human like to eat, so let us all eat!

---------------------------------

<Quolas's fortress>

Kakamu: Well, we aren't leaving just yet. We still need to find out where D-Klak went. I heard someone say the time wheel was a couple "miles" north of here... anyone know what that is in bios?

*Kakamu looks at Nadle and Bob, who seem confused*

Kakamu: I suppose I should have learned Earth measurements by now... this is Earth, right?

*A couple of humans nod at him, and one of them steps forward*

???: Someone from your group used the time wheel?

Kakamu: Yeah. Ben said that he had to so that your island would be safe.

???: Oh... well in that case, he'll be at the exit point in Tunisia in the time period that we were last in. 2015.

Quolas: Finally.

*Quolas cuts open a spacial tear next to him, which shocks a few of the humans*

Quolas: Those of you who wish to remain can do so, and I can collect you later, but I have never had the desire to leave a place as strongly as this before.

---------------------------------

<Tunisia>

Dave: That's a long story. It started back in Albuquerque, 1984, when Dave and I were born. Neither of us were-

Mike: Sometimes I think you forget I'm not your brother. We're not even from the same state! Anyway, at least one of us should have shot you by now, Klak.

Dave: Technically speaking.

Mike: Yeah. Right now we're standing on the exit point of the most secret location on Earth, with orders to shoot anyone who comes out, so you should consider yourself lucky we were on shift today.

Dave: Yep!

Mike: But hey, you seem like a pretty nice guy, so-

Dave: We're gonna help you get back home!

Mike: Wait, what? Hey, that's not what I was gonna-

Dave: Shush.

*Dave takes off his jacket and tosses it to D-Klak*

Dave: Wrap yourself up in that and get on the horse.

Mike: Dave, what the hell are you doing?

Dave: I'm taking him to the Stargate, ya dingus! We'll send him through back to his home planet, and nobody will ever know he was here.

Mike: Uh, yes they will, it's guarded...

Dave: Well... hmm...

*A tear in space suddenly opens next to them, so Mike and Dave's horses rear and flee*

Mike: NO, DON'T DO THAT! YOU'VE DOOMED US ALL!

---------------------------------

<Malcolm's ship>

*JC Denton screams internally*

Spoony: A new enemy?! Fire photon torpedoes!

*Mortimer gets up and cracks his knuckles*

Mortimer: Another challenger stands in the way of our freedom? Let us at them!

---------------------------------

<Meme World, surface>

Hungry-man: That filled me up right good an' proper.

*The Jet-Ball II crash survivors join the log cabin crash survivors*

---------------------------------

<Linkit>

The Sahagin found that the Agrippa paid less notice to them than they thought they would. Whole tribes of Agrippa, who were trapped beneath the formerly-hazardous surface for years, emerged from their caves and adjusted their eyes to the light. The first thing many of them did was drive straight into the newly-formed rivers that led to the seas, and beyond that, immense jungles on continents far away. Few of the Agrippa were left, but now that their habitat had been restored, it wouldn't take long for them to repopulate the planet. The few Agrippa who remained near the ships to inspect the Sahagin eyed their saviors with awe. One of the last Agrippa to emerge from the caves was an aged, light-skinned member of the species, with brown horns and blunt claws. Seemingly the leader of his tribe, he approached the Sahagin diplomat, while some other Agrippa relayed the diplomat's message to the chieftain in his native tongue.

"Sahagin... I do not know this word," the Agrippa chieftain grumbled at the diplomat. "It is you who filled the earth with water, ushered out the night to bring in day?"

The Agrippa around him murmured in agreement and the chieftain continued.

"Who are the Sahagin, who hold such power? Why settle on the Agrippa-world?"

---------------------------------

<Mordor>

A falling star could be seen in the night sky. Two guards outside the Great Beings' fortress noticed it, but deemed it nothing more than a passing comet. However, the star neared closer... and closer... until it could be clearly seen as a ball of flame rapidly descending towards the fortress. The guards abandoned their posts and ran for their lives as it became apparent that they were in its path. A humanoid figure emerged from the falling object and somersaulted out of it just before it hit the ground and exploded. The alien was flung towards the gate of the fortress by the resulting shockwave and crashed into the ground, coming to a stop only a few yards away. The gate guardians stopped in their tracks and approached the alien with cautious curiosity. The alien was tall and bipedal, with dark red muscle in place of skin. The lower parts of his arms and legs were fused with advanced, black machinery, and his chest was covered with curved armor that was fused to his flesh. His armor showed signs of originally being black and gold, though it had since been spray-painted bright orange and marked with a code as if he was a prisoner.

As the guards approached it, the alien leaped up and kicked the first guard in the jaw, dislocating it. As the second guard reached for his sword, the alien pulled out his own and slashed his opponent's hand, causing the guard to drop his sword and cry out in pain. The alien grabbed him by the neck and pulled him close to relay a message.

"Tell your masters that Koranis has returned."

Koranis dropped the frightened guard on the floor. The guard ran inside the fortress to inform his superiors.

OOS: Anyone who has a Great Being to control inside the fortress can jump in here.

<Saskana>

Two individuals warped down in a flash of violet light. The first was known to all - Malygos, clad in rich robes of violet. The other was not - clad from head to toe in smooth, white armor, wicked blades and guns in the elegant Dominion design attached to their forearms. The armored one spoke, her voice harsh, direct, and female. "Why do we not move against Mazkertis? We outnumber him - instead of lying in wait, why not find and surround him, lest he escape?"

Malygos nodded. "Because I do not trust these snakes to not betray us the first chance they get." He paused. "I do not believe you've met - this is Legatus Livia sas Junius, Hand of the Dominion."

She gave a curt nod. "So, you must be Blackout, I assume."

While Livia was talking, another flash of violet - a squadron of soldiers clad in imperial purple, some bearing guns, some magitek swords and spears, and some magic staves and tomes. Towering above the squadron were two massive, black, horned, colossi of metal and magic, wielding massive swords with the Imperial Star etched into them. They looked down with glowing violet eyes, awaiting orders from their masters.

---

<Mordor>

Eos smirked. "With pleasure," he said, firing another bolt of light at the Phantom's head, his bow reshaping itself into a shield to absorb the flame. Just as it had, Eos charged forward, taking the shield as it shaped itself into a sword, swinging it up at Phantom.

Hassan leaped up into the air, the force of the grenade blast still enough to push her forward. She dropped into a roll and came up...nowhere. She had vanished entirely, hiding in the shadows of the fight. One of the techniques of Hassan - to vanish from sight entirely. From her perch in the shadows, above the fight, she smirked. Perhaps these metal foes would be less easy to kill than her usual targets, but...

She threw another knife just barely missing IG-88, trying to make him dodge to the left so that her other knife would skewer his head...

---

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Sachiel sighed. "There is one, in the upper districts, I believe. I know not her name, but she is a specialist in psionics." He tilted his head. "I'm still unsure why you came here, of all places."

---

<Linkit>

The diplomat bowed. "The Sahagin are the people from the water world of Sapsa. We have, until now, kept to ourselves. Yet, even from your holes you must have seen the ascension of the one called Malygos." He paused, letting the Agrippa murmur amongst themselves. "Landwalkers have always desired what is ours. When they come to take, we must fight them tooth and claw for all of our ocean. Yet can we simply remain in one spot, waiting for the landwalkers to take what they believe to be theirs?" His voice turned grim. "You yourself have suffered this, when the Makuta blasted your world into oblivion, forcing you to hide in the caves deep beneath the waves. We know the same, for once there were two races that walked Sapsa. Us, the Sahagin, of the waves, and the Amal'jaa of the land. The Amal'jaa grew greedy, unsastisfied with their lot as lords of the land, and as all shorewalkers are wont, turned their avaricious eyes to the sea." He cleared his throat. "The Amal'jaa killed and enslaved our kind, forcing us to build their monuments, to catch their food, and sometimes even to fight their wars. And so it was, for centuries. For centuries they forced our kind into servitude, and for centuries we prayed for salvation." His lips turned up into a grin. "But as with you, salvation came in the form of a flood. Lord Leviathan heard our prayers, emerging from the depts with a cleansing wave, drowning the Amal'jaa and ending their empire. And so, we have decided to act. We wish to expand, so that the shorewalkers will not take our seas again. We saw your plight and chose to save you, before you died out - but now, we require your seas to form a colony upon your world - and a passageway by which Lord Leviathan may travel to any sea in our territory."

---

<Sapsa>

Sure enough, there was a response. Another of those silver, fishlike ships flew before the Kusanagi, its weapons trained on it. A transmission hailed the ship.

"I am Korr the Sharktoothed, and you are here trespassing on Lord Leviathan's waters. Identify yourselves or be blasted out of the sky."

<Sapsa>

Korr was shocked as Sefer materialized on the bridge of the ship, the liquid atmosphere of the bridge, which she was somehow able to breath, taking on a slight red glow as she rose her arms in a gesture that signified that she was unarmed. The security personnel aimed their weapons at her, but refrained from attacking - though not at the behest of their commander. An immense pressure radiated from her, denser than the liquid which filled the bridge, and filled with far more deadly intent. The corner of her mouth was raised in a smirk. She lowered herself to kneel on one knee, respectfully, with on hand splayed out on the surface of the bridge. At this, the security personnel seemed to, if not relax, rescind somewhat.

"My name is Sefer Yetzirah, Leader of the Shinsengumi. I apologize for our unintended trespass into your territory; We were not aware an exclusively sea-faring race would claim dominion over the entirety of the skies. The Kusanagi has retreated to a neutral orbit. I am alone."

She stood up, sliding her hands into her pockets. She had a look of quiet confidence on her face.

"I would like to request an immediate audience with Lord Leviathan, to discuss terms of a military alliance between our two factions."

---

<Saskana>

Captain Eurobeat surveyed Malygos's appearance through his tech-binoculars, whilst concealed behind nearby cover, wearing an invisibility cloak. Leslie was with him. He focused on the colossi.

"They're pretty big guys."

"Yeah." replied Leslie. "I suppose they are."

"What?"

"What?"

"You're supposed to say, ''For you''. I say, 'They're pretty big guys', and you say, 'For you'. Haven't you ever seen The Dark Knight Rises?"

She shrugged. "I'm sorry. I don't really like medieval films."

"W-Why do I even hang out with you..."

<Atuar Sedieres, N/A's shop>

Ray: Hey, uh, I know a ship! it's docked down at the old arena! come on, I'll show you!

Ray begins to leave the store, casting a glance over his shoulder to check if the Terugan is following him.

----------------------------------

<Malchior IV, MacDaniel>

Dreis: Aw, Jesus, look, we don't wanna buy any, and even if we did, I'm not sure this chain ain't even a functioning business. Look girly, take a hike, we're closed.

The mercenary flips a butterfly knife from his belt and starts picking his teeth, eyeing the girl carefully. His other hand drifts up toward his pistol, but scratches absently at his chest instead.


---------------------------------

<The brig of the Kusanagi>

A dark skinned man sits on the floor of his cell, his legs crossed in front of him, his hands palm down on his knees. His eyes are closed under a heavy brow, leading upward to a sloping forehead and bald pate. His body is swathed in dark purple robes, under which he wears a white karate gi. His temples are strained, as though he is in deep concentration; He is, in fact, meditating. An hour passes, then another, and the man does not move in any way. After a long while, his eyes snap open, and a grin forms upon his thick lips.

<The Kusanagi>

Lucy yawned, scratching the back of her neck.

"Well that was a waste of time, weren't it?" she asked, drawing another cigarette. It was taken from her hands before she could light it by Kira as he re-entered the bridge. She scowled. "What, angry that your girlfriend went and left you behind?"

"She's not my girlfriend." replied Kira.

"Actually, I was talking to Lilith." replied Lucy, winking. Lilith chuckled. Kira had a look of muffled embarrassment on his face, and turned to the view-screen, focusing on the planet below. Lucy pushed off from the wall of the bridge, floating in the low-gravity environment of the ship. "I'm going to the check up on the brig." she added, grabbing the edge of Original Zero's chair and throwing herself towards the central hallway from it. Faux rice-paper walls ran either side of her as she glided down the hallway, before grabbing onto the corner of a junction and pulling herself down an offshoot. An elevator lay at the end, which she rolled into. She gently impacted the rear wall of the car, upside down, and sighed. She reached over and pressed the command panel, sending the car down to the lower deck after the doors slid curtly shut.

She reached inside her jacket, and pulled her last cigarette out, which flew out of her hand. She tutted aggressively, reaching for it as it flew out of the opening elevator doors, and disappearing into the darkness beyond. She kicked off after it, before realizing the unusual nature of the corridor's darkness, and reaching a hand over to the wall to turn on the lights. The ceiling and wall lights failed, but the emergency lights under the floor activated, engaging one-after-the-other in a line starting at the elevator. A red glow consumed the hallway, and suddenly, a huge, imposing figure was revealed, standing, his heavy-set features illuminated from below by the emergency lighting.

"Are you trying to escape?" Asked Lucy, her fingers wrapping around the hilt of the Katana as she gently touched down on the floor.

"Yes. I am." Replied Cassius Calm, the prisoner who had been held in the brig.

Lucy grinned, pointing to Cassius with her free arm.

"I've gotta hand it to you - that's pretty bloody evil. Getting thrown in a jail cell for attacking an innocent woman in the streets - well, as innocent a woman as Sefer Yetzirah can be - and then breaking out, to try again? Especially after begging for your life? That's pretty dastardly, I'll give you that. But I'm no saint myself. In fact, I'm regarded amongst the Shinsengumi as being an absolutely irredeemable delinquent. You see, if I ever see someone talking about Neon Genesis Evangelion, I always punch them straight in the face, even if they're just a little kid. And if I even suspect that someone standing near me is listening to vaporwave, I always cut their headphone cables - even, no, especially if they've got a nice set. If I see children misbehaving in public, I'll always shout at them, even if their parents are nearby - and if their parents take issue with it, then I shout at them too. So I guess you've got to ask yourself one thing, scrub - do you really want to fight a prime evil like myself?"

Cassius took up a wide-legged stance, his fists planted by his hips. "I have never begged for my life."

"Oh? Then I guess we'll just have to change that!" she said, kicking her head back, her eyes still fixed on Cassius. "Sympathy!"



At this command, Lucy's Stand, Sympathy For The Devil, materialized behind her. It was half as tall again as her, hovering just off the ground, and gave off an imposing aura that would have shot through any normal man like a crossbow bolt; Cassius, however, remained stalwart. Lucy stepped forwards, and Sympathy For The Devil shot through her, phasing through her body like a ghost, its fist raised to attack. Flame engulfed its armored hand as it sped towards Cassius, the heat of it melting the walls of the Kusanagi, which buckled as the aftershock of Sympathy For The Devil's incredible speed hit them. Sympathy For The Devil's mouth shot open, the metallic restraints holding its jaw shut smashing into fragments, as it let out its battlecry;

"OOOOOOOORRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

<The Kusanagi>

Calm reached up with his left hand, tearing his purple robes from his shoulder, and casting them toward the rapidly advancing Sympathy For The Devil. The robes fluttered, hanging in the air for a moment, before a low shout was bellowed by Calm. He swept his hands toward the robes, his mouth widening as he screamed.

"NOBLE EIGHTFOLD PATH!" The robes took shape, cladding themselves around a swirling vortex of white energy that formed itself rapidly into a vaguely humanoid shape. The figure seemed as a ghostly apparition, with only the robes appearing corporeal; It was almost a mannequin. A huge eight-spoked wheel was strapped via the robes to its back; the wheel glowed a pale gold, shimmering as Calm's stand, Noble Eightfold Path, settled into a pose with one arm outstretched above its head, and the other outstretched as though clasping an orb.

Noble Eightfold Path swept its arms quickly toward Sympathy For The Devil, grasping the punch and flipping backward, throwing Sympathy over its head. Sympathy dragged Noble Eightfold Path with it; Calm ducked low, and the stands whipped past him, stopping some way down the corridor. Meanwhile, Calm leapt at Lucy, raising both his fists in a hammer form above his head.

<The Kusanagi>

Flying through the air, Sympathy For The Devil threw its chest back, charging its fists with power; one with fire, and the other with ice. It unleashing a lightning fast torrent of punches towards Noble Eightfold Path, which threw it to the floor, but failed to break the protective field it had generated. SFTD threw its left fist into the roof, stopping itself, and then reading its right arm, a metallic, flaming blade sliding out of its forearm. It kicked down towards NEP, and thrust this blade towards NEP's neck, the tip of it impacting his defensive field. SFTD threw its head back, opening its jaw so far that it appeared to be dislocated, and let out a scream.

"OOOOOOOOORRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

A gout of fire erupted from the rear of SFTD's forearm, like a rocket engine, and the blade shot through the defensive field, impaling NEP though the chest. Cassius made no indication of the burning pain in his chest, and instead carried on with his attack, drawing his fists down towards Lucy. She backstepped the attack, but Cassius continued, reaching down towards the floor and planting his hands on the ground, then turning the entire motion into a forward flip. His feet shot over him as he kicked Lucy in the face, sending her flying backwards, slamming into the elevator doors. The pain from the attack was transmitted to SFTD, causing it to stumble, its head jerking back as if it had taken the attack itself. NEP slid its legs up into the space between it and SFTD, and kicked, throwing it off of NEP. The blade slid out of NEP's chest, leaving no wound.

Lucy stood back up, wiping the blood under her nose away with the back of her hand, before turning the same hand into a fist, and throwing it towards Cassius's face. He caught it in one hand, and pulled her towards him with it, drawing her stomach towards his fist. She doubled over as Cassius brought his knee up into her face, sending her head flailing backwards. She stumbled, kicking herself backwards, and taking up a stance. She grinned.

"You're pretty good."

At this, she pulled her guns from her jacket - twin Beretta 93rs, in a custom black-and-red color scheme, with custom compensators fitted to the end of each barrel. She flicked each-one to "full auto" and unleashed them on Cassius. He kicked himself upwards, then ran along the roof, chased by the impact explosions as Lucy shot towards him. He kicked downwards, his knee aimed at Lucy's throat, but she sidestepped, and Cassius impacted the ground, kicking off again and narrowly avoiding the last bullets in Lucy's mags. She discarded her guns, drawing her Katana, and chased towards Cassius as he stood up and turned to face her. She swung towards him; he deflected the blade with the palm of his hand, slapping it away, with his left arm folded behind his back. She twisted the blade, swinging it back upwards, and he did the same; he continued to block her for 10, 20, 40 swings until she discarded the blade, jumping backwards, and drawing two combat knives from her pockets. She threw the two blades towards his head; he placed his hands together in a prayer formation, then opened them as the blades passed, batting them away with the backs of his hand - then, Lucy's fist shot through his parted hands, nailing him in the forehead. The two went flying back, with Cassius crashing into the elevator doors. Lucy drew her fist back, screaming, and drove it into his forehead, again and again, until she could no longer hold a fist. She swapped hands, and continued. Cassius drove his forehead into the punch, and Lucy let out an oddly girlish scream of pain as her fingers splayed apart in random directions, accompanied by the sickening crack of bone. She fell backwards enough that Cassius could drive his fist into her sternum, cracking it. Blood shot out of her mouth as she flew backwards, impacting the wall. Both remained motionless, too weak to keep their stands summoned, and with the sound of heavy, strained breathing, filling the hallway. Cassius's forehead was cut open and bleeding. The white of Lucy's right eye was completely bloodshot, and blood trickled from both her nose, and the corners of her mouth. She pushed off from the wall, standing in the middle of the corridor to face Cassius.

"Sefer... made this look a whole lot easier."

"Give up."

"Heh." she replied, wincing as she coughed painfully. "You really don't get me, do you?"

She pointed towards Cassius with her one functioning hand, and grinned. "Sympathy!"

"Noble Eightfold Path!"

Their two Stands materialized, both ready speeding towards each other. Sympathy For The Devil copied the actions Lucy was making; readying its right fist, which was imbued with the element of fire, a devastating cone of explosive propulsion roaring from the rear of its forearm. Noble Eightfold Path copied Cassius, raising its fist, the atmosphere of the ship visibly curving around the force-field generated around it, which was unsteady, taking on the appearance of translucent blue flame. Sympathy For The Devil's mouth shot open as it roared, its six eyes glowing red. The two fists impacted.

After the Stands, and the smoke caused by their explosive meeting, had dissipated, only a huge spherical crater where the corridor had been remained, walled in molten metal. Other decks and corridors were visible around the edges, as well as exposed cabling and piping. The rooms directly next to the corridor, as well as those above, had been completely wiped out. Lucy look at Cassius from across the crater, her finger still pointing towards him. She motioned with it like a gun.

"You're... pretty good."

She fell forwards, unconscious, blood trailing from her nose. Cassius shot forwards, jumping over the crater, catching her before she could fall into the molten pit below. He cradled her in his arms, looking around for a way out. His breathing was heavy, and the pain in his chest and forehead was intense, but none of that was important right now. The other Shinsengumi would have noticed what had happened, and would be on their way.

<Stelta-Stal>

Caiaphus: "Attack them? No....we will lead them. They will become part of our legion."

*He opens a portal, and steps through it*

---

<Quolas' fortress>

*Bob nods and twiddles his thumbs*

*Nadle is pondering something with a worried look on his face*

---

<Tunisia>

*D-Klak grabs the jacket*

DK: "Gee, thanks guys I-"

*Quolas appears. D-Klak jumps in fear and runs*

D-Klak: "IT'S HAPPENING!"

*He hides, then realizes it's Quolas*

D-Klak: "Oh. Hello, Quolas. These are my new friends."

---

<Malcolm's ship>

Paul Latza: "Yeah, brohoof!"

*Linkara brohoofs Latza*

Malcolm: "Let's go!"

*Malcolm gets in, and the "Doug" ((the Disney TV show)) theme starts playing*

Doug: "NOOOOOO!"

*The ship flies away. An unspecified amount of time later, they are at the planet Bring The Pain Barry and 90s Kid are on*

OOS: You can take over, Kon.

---

<Meme World, surface>

*Harold is annoyed by Hungry-man's callousness and greedy desire for filin' grub. He is about to transform, but he holds the pain down.*

CIA Guy: "He didn't plant so good!"

*CIA laughs and pats Hungry-Man on the back*

TTT: "i truely hope he wil return from this destructoin"

---

<Mordor, Angonce's Prison>

*Figlio continues his search. He taps on a few walls in the hallway, until he hears a hollow noise coming from the other side. He smiles, and places his hand in the middle of the wall. A whirring noise spreads throughout the hall, and a secret door opens. Figlio steps into a room that is pitch black, save for a glowing blue light in the distance. He steps towards this light, and it gets closer to him.*

*Figlio bites his lip inquisitively as he reaches towards the light with his arm. The only source of illumination in the room is revealed to be a small turquoise crystal with a golden piece of metal in the middle. He grabs the object, and it transforms into a crystal staff*

*A few minutes later, in the midst of the fighting, Figlio arrives and raises the staff*

Figlio: "Surrender, droids! Or I will find the Keruvim!"

OOS: DUN DUN DUNNNN!

--

<Mordor, GB Fortress>

*Huriel is walking down the hallway, reading some information. He hears Koranis landing and doing his thing*

Huriel: "What?"

---

<Saskana>

Spotter: "Happy to meet you all."

*Cutter mutters something, while Axalara nods and smiles at Malygos and his crew. Moe stays silent*

*D-Klak (4) puts on the hood of his cowl, and hides among the crowd*

*Mazkertis floats up to the energy spire, ignoring the party. He is about to prepare the absorption process when he notices something, and moves up to where Malygos, Blackout, and Ynot are*

Axalara: "Are you-"

*Everyone suddenly feels someone entering their mind.*

Mazkertis: "(tp to all) A wizard! I see that you have several colossi in your party, very interesting. In that respect, there are not many differences between our universes. I am Mazkertis, and I...."

*He notices Ynot*

Mazkertis: "You, I remember you. On that distant planet. I presume that you all have decided to join me in my cause. All I ask for is energy."

Cutter: "We've come here to end this, human."

Mazkertis: "Have you? Oh come now, at least the wizard and the Makuta must see the folly of all this! Stand aside, or be eliminated."

D-Klak (4): "Mazkertis!"

*Mazkertis's eyes widen, and he turns to D-Klak (4). He begins shaking with anger in hatred*

D-Klak (4): "Stop this. You're acting irrationally. These people have nothing to do with our problems. I am sorry for what happened all those years ago, but it's no excuse for you to go on a rampage. Revenge will destroy you."

Mazkertis: (tp) "The other one lied to me. All Klaks lie. YOU LIE!"

*He is about to fire green lightning out of his fingers when Perseus blasts him off of the platform*

Perseus: "*to the others* Look alive, people!"

*He flies down to catch Mazkertis*

Moe: "Was that....Perseus?"

Cutter: "I thought he was a Platinum Lantern!"

Axalara: "I'm as confused as you are, but we'll have to ask for answers later. Let's go!"

*Axalara controls the air to help her fly away. Moe transforms into an eagle, and carries Cutter with him. Spotter seems to be setting up some sort of observation post. D-Klak (4) nods at Blackout*

D-Klak (4): "Shall we?"

*He jumps off the platform and pulls out his hookblades*

*Mazkertis and Perseus are in a gravity-defying fist fight below*

---

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Fourteen: "Because I figured you could help. Besides, you know Lord Ozar has protected you from this dangerous neighborhood. *He chuckles* Thanks, mate."

*Fourteen makes his way to the door*

---

<Malchior IV, MacDaniel>

Girl: "I'm not selling anything! This is an invitation to join us."

*She gives Dreis a pamphlet with information about HYDRA, along with a Maoist-inspired picture of the Supreme HYDRA holding a sun in his hand, and several Malchiorian humans looking at him in awe*

*The girl leaves*

--

<Malchior IV, Claws Camp>

*Klak falls asleep again*

OOS: Waiting on DRJ and Red for the rest.

<Stelta-Stal>

*Xikila follows Caiaphus into the portal*

---------------------------------

<Atuar Sadiares, N/A's shop>

The Terugan looked between Ray and Amy, torn between whether to leave now or stay and eat. While she was deciding, her stomach growled, reminding her that it was probably a better idea to stay.

"Food first. Then ship!" She said with a smile. She walked up to Amy, ordered some fish, then turned back to face Ray. "Name's Zae. You Ray?"

---------------------------------

<Quolas's fortress>

*A dirty and exhausted Ben appears on the horizon, walking with the aid of a large stick*

*Once he reaches Nadle and co.'s position, he sits down on a log to rest and takes his backpack off*

*Ben then notices Kakamu, Nadle, and Bob, and audibly groans*

Ben: Oh, you're still here...

Kakamu: We were just leaving, actually.

*Kakamu goes to step into the spatial tear, but before he does, he turns back to ask Ben one last question*

Kakamu: Just one more thing. What the hell is this place?

Ben: That's on a need-to-know basis.

Kakamu: Well I need to know.

Ben: The only answers you'll get here are the ones that you decide for yourself.

*Ben notices that the spatial tear behind Kakamu is starting to flicker*

Ben: I suppose that's your way out of here. You'd better get moving, or you'll be stuck with me for the rest of your life. In the 80s.

Kakamu: Quolas knows where we are. He can always come and pick me up.

Ben: Well I'm sorry to say, but I don't think I made him feel very welcome here.

*Kakamu grits his teeth and jumps into the spatial tear*

*Ben sarcastically smiles and waves*

Ben: 'Till the next time!

*Another human inhabitant of the island walks past and shakes his head*

Francis: I hate aliens.

---------------------------------

<Tunisia>

*Mike looks warily at Quolas from behind the sand dune he's hiding behind*

Mike: Please tell me that you know this guy. I swear, if there's a superpowered alien brawl about to break out I'm gonna run to Egypt all by myself.

Quolas: Relax. I'm a friend of many.

*Kakamu jumps out of the spatial tear, landing on the sand and rolling back onto his feet*

Dave: That was the single coolest thing I have ever seen in my entire life.

Kakamu: Ah, D-Klak! Good to see you again. Who are these people?

---------------------------------

<Mordor, GB fortress>

*The guard from earlier answers Huriel*

Guard: That's all he said, my lord.

*The door at the end of the hallway bursts open and Koranis marches in*

*Two other guards draw their swords and swing them at Koranis, but he parries them with his own sword and kicks the guards away*

*Koranis picks up one of the guard's swords with his free hand, walks up to the recovering guards, and stabs them both through the chest at the same time*

*He then looks up at Huriel and shouts*

Koranis: Bring me HEREMUS!!

---------------------------------

<Malcolm's ship>

*Malcolm's ship lands in a field on the planet that Barry's transmission originated from*

*As the hatch extends and the passengers step out, they are surprised to see that the planet is not some kind of meme world, but actually something resembling medieval England*

*The only sign of civilization nearby is a small village on the horizon*

*JC Denton seems irritated by the landscape*

JC Denton: Where's all the tech? I'm not big into books.

Mortimer: Never mind your fancy technology, where's the dragons and goblins? Fiery ruins to loot and explore? Friendly dwarves to share a beer with?!

*As soon as Mortimer is done talking, something swoops down from the sky and grabs him by the shoulders with a pair of talons*

*Mortimer screams as the beast carries him away into the village yonder*

*Dr. Bedge is the only one who got a good look at the creature, so he grins with excitement*

Dr. Bedge: Did you see that?! It was a griffin, straight out of Greek mythology! Isn't that fascinating?

*Dr. Pavel nods, but looks worried*

Spanha: Well, come on. Mortimer isn't going to save himself, and neither is that 90s Kid!

*Spanha runs towards the village, so the others follow her*

---------------------------------

<Meme World, surface>

Hungry-man: just in time fer sunday lunch, i 'ope

Bateman: We should investigate the ship. There might be some videotapes inside!

---------------------------------

<Linkit>

The chieftain made a humming noise, signifying that he was deep in thought. He then clicked his tongue at several of his companions, who promptly kneeled at the diplomat's feet. The chieftain gripped his staff and nodded at the diplomat while retaining eye contact.

"A colony... hmm... yes. These are waters of your creation. They belong to you. My kin will help you build this passageway for this Leviathan."

He then clicked his claws together, so the other Agrippa ran over to the Sahagin ship to offer their assistance.

"We are proficient builders, but materials are scarce. Irradiated rock makes for poisonous ships. Is that a problem you can also solve?"

---------------------------------

OOS: Waiting on Nif for Dong Squad, Red for Archon-7, and DRJ for At-Sad.

[Hell]
"I need to ability to leave here. I came here randomly and unwillingly, so it'd be best if I leave immediately." Nif analyzed the surroundings, looking for anymore residents that imitated The Heller.

-----

[Rhadan]
Sinjon then switched the dial. He now had to call up all his. Nigers. He then pull out a list of names, starting with his own family: Woll Wol, Wot Wol, Wololowei Wol, Wong Wol, Dakk Dak, Wugg Wug, Hoh Huhh, Konn Kon, Wolol Hohlo, Dengdengdeng-deng Deng-dengdeng, Fig Newton, Memme Meme, Old Man Ross, Richard Ross, Ricardo Ross, Akot Deng Kon, Kek Kug, Will Willson, among others and their associates.

He asked each and everyone of them to meet up in the underground catacombs, under the palace. They all agreed, and they were all asked to bring the most explosives possible.

Meanwhile, Doug continued his daily routine work in the palace. He was preparing the plans to kill Gaon, through poisoning his food. As Doug was designated the only man suitable for feeding Gaon as his personal chef, he would be the only one suspected. But at the same time, he was trusted. He could get away with the ruse. The Royal Guards of Gaon were incompetent. They were as lazy and fat as Gaon, only equipped with chainguns and rocket launchers on their hoverboards.

Serving Gaon another dish of food, Doug sighed. Gaon was still sitting around, watching Spacehoop 10k15 in his lounge bed. Gaon laughed and was angered by the places, as any stereotypical sports fan acts. As Doug walked away, taking the hovercart, he niggardly rubbed his hands together. "Hehe, stupid giy."

-----

[Meme World, Surface]
The crew on BONES' ship tried to make contact with the crashed ship team. They roughly pinned down the coordinates of the crash them, then beamed down themselves as holograms with the pasta beams.

"Greetings Meme World Squad. We have an urgent request of all of you. We need your help to take down a big guy known as Tommy Wiseau. You will be well-paid for your troubles. Do any of you agree?"

-----

[Meme World, underground]
BONES' dash for The Mask was successful. He shoved all of his rattled bones into Wiseau's face, pinning down the nerves The Mask had injected itself on Tommy to heal his wounds, something unusual for the Mask to do, as any attempt to pull it off worked, under normal circumstances. This was not normal. BONES' skeletal fingers shattered inside Wiseau's head.

"Ow! You stupid mudderfugger! I'll kill you, betch!" He expunged the fingers out from his head with his vampiric powers of controlling his own blood.

Tommy then lunged at BONES, but BONES dodged him easily. Tommy was getting weak. The Mask wasn't helping him as fast this time.

"Big Head Wiseau, give up now, or I'll have to use...my ultimate move!"
"Haha, good joke Skelly Bones, but it is I who will use my ultimate."
"Last chance, Tommy. Take off The Mask and hand it over."
"Nah. Don't even say that, man."
"Then...you leave me no choice." BONES laughed his maniac laugh, and then spread his legs. His back crotched over, and his arms formed into two Ls. His hips began to shake. And then he screamed it: "SKELLY BONES!" A song began to rattle through his bones, echoing through the cave.

The Meme Kid, who was watching the scene, screamed. He couldn't believe the meme he had just seen, because it was so extreme. This old meme just made a comeback, so eloquently and well.

Wiseau's mind then began to blow up. This dance, a dance of death, constructed by death itself...even something that defied the laws of the universe itself, The Mask, couldn't save him. He began to crumble to dust, fading away. He removed The Mask.

"I give up....just stop!"

But the dance continued. Skelly BONES showed no mercy. "You killed my friends. You thought you had won. But Death always comes. And there shall always be the dance." Wiseau faded away, all that remained was his hand that had removed The Mask, now turned into a rock statue. BONES went over to collect The Mask, but realized he didn't have any fingers anymore.

<Saskana>

*Blackout nods to acknowledge Livia, when he hears Mazkertis' message*

Blackout: *telepathically* You stand aside, fiend. You know nothing of the forces arrayed against-

*He's interrupted by Perseus blasting Mazkertis away*

Blackout: *to D-Klak* Certainly.

*He draws his sword and jumps off the platform*


Ynot: A Platinum Lantern? God, I hope I don't have to bail him out. Kurenitsu, I'm going to need some help. Rest of you, look lively.

*He jumps off the platform, flying down to catch Mazkertis*

*Kurenitsu creates an illusion of there being three Ynots, all heading at Mazkertis at high speed*


*Starscream flies up to Spotter, and helps him set up the observation post*


*Suddenly, Von Budberg's ship pulls up near the platform*

-----

<Mordor>

*IG-88 switches to infrared vision, and spots Hassan*

*He notes the knife, and moves his head to the right, avoiding the trap*

*He then opens fire at Hassan anyway*


*Black Phantom rolls away, easily avoiding the sword*

BP: I feel no pleasure.

*Eos hears a slight buzzing noise, and looks down, realising that BP's mace is actually a staff with a mace on one end and a saw on the other*

*He is about to slash at Eos' foot, when Figlio returns*

BP: Keruvim..... Error. Explain.

-----

<Malchior IV>

*Aster smiles*

Aster: So they wouldn't see your face! What, did you think-

*She steps off the elevator*

-----

<Atuar Sadiares>

*Amy reluctantly takes the credit card*

Amy: Um.....

*She hands her the fish, and then steps away to talk to Nikolai*

*The others can hear little snippets of conversation*

Nikolai: We just bought it! And does she even look-

Amy: We don't need that piece of junk anyway-

Amy: Think of the cash-

*A few minutes later, they return*

Nikolai: Hey, um, if you really need a ship, we could sell you one, real cheap.

Amy: We just bought it at an auction round here. I think it's a Terugan ship too, so you won't have problems with the controls or anything. What do you say?

*They step away to let Zae decide*

-----

<The Bat-Cave>

*The next day, F-Blackout uses his fragmentation power to create a small explosion, waking everyone up*

-----

<Stelta-Stal>

*Ricochet teleports after them*

-----

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*Alan signs the autograph*


*The next day, after breakfast, he goes out to buy the day's newspapers*

<Saskana>

Malygos looked down, sighing. "Not much use this army's going to be whilst Mazkertis is down there." The drew their sleeve back, energy flaring around them, their violet cape billowing behind them as they rose into the air. "Junius, you have command. I will deal with Mazkertis."

And with that, Malygos flew down, violet energy gathering into a massive ray of energy fired straight at Mazkertis. Livia put her hand to the transmitter in her helmet. "This is Legatus Livia sas Junius to the Bahamut. We need air superiority fighters down here on the double!"

She released the communication, and- "This is the Bahamut. We'l get them manned and down there ASAP. Locking onto your coordinates."

---

<Mordor>

Hassan leapt out of the way, unfortunately suffering a graze on her shoulder, drawing blood. Damn. This guy was good. Thing. Robot. Whatever. The machine was damn good with a gun - perhaps it'd be best to try to disable it... She leapt down, keeping Hassan pinned down with another barrage of daggers, aimed at his head, closing the gap between them. She grinned, bringing down her hidden blade upon the machine's gun-holding arm.

Eos took this moment to go into a spin and slam his palm into Black Phantom's head. "Pathetic," he snorted, firing a massive blast of light through his head.

---

<Hell, The Black Throne>

Mephistopheles nodded. "Yes, yes. Trapped here by way of dimensional mistake, like many others before you. Few, however, have been granted a royal audience." He smirked. "And thus, you must offer my something for I to do you a favor. What have you brought me, young Niflheim?"

---

<Linkit>

The ambassador nodded. "We can bring down materials for the construction of the portal; and once the Lord of the Whorl is made manifest on your world, you need not worry about the irradiation."

He extended a cold, clawed hand. "Do we have a deal, Chieftan of the Agrippa?"

---

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Sachiel smiled wryly. "You know as well as I do that Ozar's protection only goes so far. Numerous other parties in the upper levels would prefer to give me a taste of their medicine. You'll notice that I only occasionally get some volunteers here."

He chuckled at his own bad joke. "Still, I am grateful to him. If you like, Fourteen, I could come with you. I planned to close up shop for the night anyway - one man can only do so much."

---

<Sapsa>

"Request? Immediate?" Korr threw back his head in a snarling laugh. "One does not request an audience with Lord Leviathan, least of all one who is a shorewalker." He spit the word. "As you come alone and have respected our edicts, I can bring you before the Chamber of the Whorlspeakers - perhaps they will hear you."

<a top secret location in the Hyrulean Sector>

Impa 11 paced in front of the two fresh out of training clones, almost floor length lavender hair swaying behind her, and her full skirts giving her a regal air. "Zelda 25, Link 38, your new assignment just came in." It would be the pair's first official mission, and while they'd both shown a great deal of promise in training, it was hard to be quite sure of how well they'd perform on the field. She couldn't help but worry. Two pairs of blue eyes regarded her, too well-mannered to prompt her in her stalling.

With a sigh she pulled the disc out of her pocket that showed a hologram of the target. a lavender skinned Hylian with matching hair, black markings around his red eyes, and purple robes. "This is Vaati 03. He has failed to meet his scheduled check-in, and suspected to be at fault for some recent temporal fluctuations. Your mission is to apprehend him and take him in for evaluation. Force is authorized, but we'd rather you not kill him if you can avoid it."

Zelda nodded looking serious. "Noted. We'll approach him peacefully at first to assess the situation." Link also nodded "I'm sure we have plenty to offer him as allies."

11 allowed herself a smile as she handed them the disc. They were just so cute and serious! "Your ship is an Epona IX class ship, and is equipped with a PROXI artificial intelligence. The list of your supplies is on the disc, but you may requisition anything else you feel is necessary. Hylia be with you."

<Neo-Z'traa>

*Caiaphus grunts as he enters the hostile landscape of a nearly destroyed world*

Caiaphus: "It's worse than I thought. They destroyed this place. I wonder if there are any survivors."

---

<Quolas' fortress>

*Nadle nods, and enters the spacial tear*

Bob *to Francis*: "Hey, that's racist!"

*Bob shakes Ben's hand*

Bob: "I wanted to spend more time with you all! Perhaps next time we're LOST we will find you, and you can Locke onto our position. The Users will have to decide."

*Bob pauses for a good minute, and then jumps into a portal*

OOS: Will we come back to the island someday?

---

<Tunisia>

*Nadle jumps in*

D-Klak: "Hello, all! Kakamu, Nadle, Quolas, meet Mike and Dave. Mike and Dave, meet Kakamu, Nadle, and Quolas. We're all from space, and I'm from another dimension! I bet you don't see that every day, do you?"

---

<Mordor, GB fortress>

*Huriel panics*

Huriel: "I...I have no idea where he is!"

---

<Malcolm's ship>

*The characters arrive at the village*

Paul Latza: "Where do we even start?"

Spoony: "Ask a random townsperson! They usually know what's up. After all, this is an RPG."

---

<Meme World, surface>

*Bateman starts searching for Terugan videotapes, while TTT starts searching the wreckage with other joke characters. CIA Guy tries interviewing some of the Terugan survivors*

CIA Guy: "Was surviving part of your plan?"

*Suddenly, they see the pasta beam holograms of the ayy-liums*

Harold: "Tommy Wiseau? What has he done?"

*Space Ryan Gosling stares at the hologram*

SRG: "You give me a time and a place, I give you a five minute window. Anything happens in that five minutes and I'm yours. No matter what. Anything happens a minute either side of that and you're on your own. Do you understand?"

Car Guard: "Mmm, hte spagheti, reminds me of my mum."

*Car Guard falls asleep*

Hassan-ill-Sabah: "Haha Just Saying, they aren't playing."

John Freeman: "This truely sounds too dangerous, but we must do what has tobe done!"

*LeTrole Rusemann watches from afar, having climbed back up to the surface. His b8 wasn't being taken by the Memes Kid or by BONES. Perhaps this new group of joke characters would fall for his trickster antics*

---

<Meme World, underground>

*The Heckler paused for a moment, wondering if there was a heck to give. He shrugged, and found none.*

*The Reddit Alien and King Harkinian silently weep because of the dead Dongers, and because of the horrible violence*

---

<Saskana>

*Using his power over sonics, D-Klak (4) floats around the battle (ala X-Men: First Class)*

*Mazkertis sees Malygos's attack coming. He grabs Perseus and throws him at the magic. The Toa yells in pain and falls into the sea. Cutter drops from Moe, attempting to cut into the wizard, but he grabs him and throws him at Blackout. The Ynots charge at Mazkertis, and he summons fists of pure water to attack all of them. Axalara and Moe attempt to get close, but he blasts them both away with fire magic. He turns to D-Klak, and charges at him*

Mazkertis: "(tp)YOU!!!"

*Mazkertis grabs D-Klak (4) and punches him several times. D-Klak (4) pushes the wizard away with the Force, and drops into the sea. Mazkertis is blasted back, and turns around. He flies to Livia and Von Budberg's ship*

Spotter: "Thanks, my name's Spotter! *Spotter sees Mazkertis incoming* GET READY!"

*Perseus flies out of the water in rage and glares at Malygos. He glows with Red Lantern energy that feeds of off his irrational rage*

Perseus: "Why would you do that?! I'm on your side now!"

*Suddenly, another Mazkertis appears right next to Captain Eurobeat. This one seems to be bleeding, and is unaware of his surroundings. He quickly disappears.*

---

<Mordor>

*The fight continues. Figlio mutters to himself while gripping the staff. It starts to glow. He slowly walks up to the droids*

---

<Malchior IV>

*Rainn is still stunned. He awkwardly stumbles out of the elevator*

---

<The Bat-Cave>

*Rahn screams when he wakes up. Anarky is nowhere to be seen. Julio calmly gets up and brushes his alien teeth*

---

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*Senator Patr Vazquez buys a cup of coffee from the local stand. He notices Sen. Skedaddle, and silently hopes to "bump into" him*

---

<Liquid Metallicon Clinic>

Fourteen: "Sure. Yer the only one who knows the place anyway. Shall we?"

---

<Malchior IV, Klak's Location>

*Klak is muttering in his sleep*

Me: No...no get away you son of...Nar'zathaa, I don't want to be a lemur.

*Lalli Cain wakes up, and gets ready*

OOS: Waiting on Claymore and Red for the rest.

<The Kusanagi>

Calm looked around, smoke filling his nostrils. The emergency lights flickered and then went out. Calm brought out Noble Eightfold Path just in time to catch a steel beam as it fell toward him. Clutching Lucy in his arms, he leapt across the pool of metal, NEP drifting across slowly after him. He sprinted down the corridor, turning right at the intersection, following the low green lighting that was still on in this part of the ship. He pushed off, leaping toward the elevator in the weak gravity, and punched in the button for the bridge. The car shuddered, the light flickering, but it moved away with a soft swish. Calm took two gulps of air, regulating his breathing. He glanced at the girl in his arms. Blood trickled from her mouth and right eye. With a sigh, Calm stepped toward the doors as they opened on the bridge. Zero stood by the command throne, and cast a glance toward him as he drifted into the space.

"Your ship is damaged. This girl is too. She will need medical attention. Stop the ship and I will cause no further damage." Calm spoke slowly, his deep voice reaching the furthest corners of the room. "I will be forced to fight if you do not cease your course of action." Calm pushed Lucy lightly, and she floated through the air to land in a startled Kira's arms.

--------------

<A/N's shop, Atuar Sadiares>

Ray: Hey look lady, it's your call. [Addressing A/N] You wouldn't happen to have any work available, huh?

-------------

<Malchior IV, Bourba City>

Dreis dropped the cigarette at his feet, tamping out the ashes with one heavy black boot. He sighed, exhaling the last of his smoke, and flicked his butterfly knife about his knuckles, spinning it absent-mindedly. He faced two men, both holding weapons under their coats.

"Now look... I don't know about you, but I certainly don't want to die. And I'm not planning on it. I suggest you consider carefully, gentlemen, if this is the... wisest course of action."

OOS: Anyone want to challenge Dreis?

< Sapsa >

"That would be much appreciated." replied Sefer, bowing slightly.

---

< Saskana >

Eurobeat turned to face where Mazkertis had once been, drawing his pistol - a Mauser C96 somehow modified to be a functioning laser pistol.

"Leslie! Everything's clear to me right now..."

"Huh?"

Eurobeat got up, and began running to the battle, his weapon still drawn. He centered Mazkertis in his sights as he closed in on the ship, and tutted.

"You're the evil behind all this conflict... The dark pressure that's tainting the universe! I'll drive you out of it!" he shouted, firing his pistol wildly at Mazkertis.

---

< The Kusanagi >

Zero stood up, calmly drawing his katana and bringing it down towards Cassius at a fatal angle. It stopped in midair, sparking against Lilith's katana as she drew both of their weapons to the floor.

"You bloody idiot!" she shouted, before turning to face Cassius, drawing her P99 from its holster as she did. She aimed the handgun at his forehead. After a few seconds, she lowered it somewhat. "Go."

"Lilith!" shouted Kira.

"He's right. Lucy's hurt." she replied, gritting her teeth. "I don't like it, but we've got to let him go. There's a shuttle in the hangar bay - take it."

Cassius nodded respectfully, and kicked off the floor, floating down the main corridor. Kira gently laid Lucy down against the wall. He pulled away his bloody hand, looking at it with shock. He looked back to Lucy; The gentle movement of her chest suggested she was still breathing, but her face was bloodied and cut, and the fingers of her left hand were bent in unnatural directions. He clenched his hand into a fist, angrily, and stood up.

"Lilith - take care of her."

"Kira! Don't do anything risky!"

"The only risk is in not doing anything." he replied, standing up. He kicked off the floor, speeding down the hallway towards Cassius, kicking the bridge airlock shut as he did. He drew two of his six katanas, and readied them, as he closed on Cassius. The monk turned at the last moment, as Kira's foot impacted him, throwing him into the hangar which lay at the end of the corridor. He fell down three decks worth of height as he overshot the railing at the end of the walkway, but the reduced gravity meant he landed with a comparatively gentle impact. Kira chased after, kicking off the railing.

"GATHERING CLOUDS OF HEAVEN!"

Spoiler:

Kira's Stand, Gathering Clouds Of Heaven, materialized behind him, its massive wingspan almost entirely filling the width of the hangar bay. It let out a scream, which sounded as if a choir of young boys were singing a note which was just too high-pitched for them, as Kira landed before Cassius. He stood up, spinning his katanas around each of his fingers in succession, before rapidly sheathing and unsheathing them. He spun the leftmost katana around his fingers in succession again, before throwing it to Cassius, hilt first. The monk caught it, cautiously.

"I'm eternally grateful for you sparing Lucy's life, but the fact remains that you hurt someone I care about, and I can't just let that slide - I don't care what Lilith says. We'll duel until first blood. I won't use my Stand. If I win, you return to the brig, and Sefer will decide what to do with you when you return - But if you win, you'll be free to leave. If you don't accept this duel... Gathering Clouds of Heaven will destroy you. Make your choice."

---

< The Alvarak, flagship of the Neo Ta'har fleet >
(Warning: Will not make sense without having read We're Shinsengumi Lunatics!)

Ta'varak fell to the ground, blood trailing from his mouth. Hell continued his rampage, charging through the room with twin flaming axes, cleaving guards in half. Highwater spun through the room with his double-bladed ice spear, mopping up any of the survivors of Hell's rampage. It was carnage, and the entire feat had been accomplished in only ten seconds. A new record for Assassins Sans Frontières.

Hell grinned. The pink-haired bull of a man ran a bloody hand through his wild hair, which resembled a flame in motion, before sheathing both of his axes on the outsides of his vambraces. His brother, the smaller, but more attractive, ice blue-haired Highwater folded his spear in half, sliding it horizontally into his rearmost belt loop.

"His army is near here." announced Highwater. Hell chuckled. Their leader, a handsome, silver-haired man in a suit, entered, stepping over the bodies as he made towards the still-breathing Ta'varak, eating casually from a bag of doughnuts. He was about thirty, if a bit older, with a light casing of stubble over his wide jaw. He was wide-shouldered, with a bulky, but not overly imposing, build.

"You fools... You'll be hunted to the end of the universe for this!"

"Mmmhmm. Hmmm." replied the silver-haired man, still chewing his food. He swallowed. "Yeah, sure. So, anyway, where's Sefer Yeztirah?"

"Yetzirah? This is about Yetzirah?"

"Hmmm? Well, as I literally just asked about Sefer Yetzirah, I'd have to say, uh, yeah. This is about Yetzirah."

"I won't tell you dogs a - a damned thing."

"Oh, that's so dramatic." he replied, taking another doughnut from his bag. "I won't tell you-gah!" he replied, coughing. "God, custard doughnuts? Does anyone still make these things nowadays? Highwater, do people still make custard doughnuts?"

"Yes, my lord."

"Oh, they do?" he replied, saddened, and drawing an IMI Desert Eagle from his suit jacket. "I suppose that just goes to show how out of touch I am with the world around me." he added, before aiming the handgun at Ta'varak's head, and firing. At that, even Hell shuddered.

Vance Vangelis spun the pistol around his finger, before blowing at the end of the barrel, and sheathing the weapon. Highwater began accessing the bridge's control panels, scanning for information. A doughnut or two was eaten in the time it took Highwater to find Sefer's location.

"She's at the planet Sapsa." replied Highwater. "However, Ta'varak had arranged a meeting with her, at the world of Geazo, which is closer."

Vangelis smiled. "Good. We'll head there and wait for her." he said, turning to leave. Hell and Highwater followed.

<Atuar Sadiares>

Zae took back her credit card and sat down. Once presented with a plate of fish, she wasted no time in eating it, as if she had not eaten in weeks.

---------------------------------

<Linkit>

The cheiftain of the Agrippa grinned, revealing two rows of sharp white teeth. He grabbed the diplomat's claw with his own and shook it enthusiastically.

"Yes! The Agrippa will help the Sahagin. My workers will start gathering materials immediately."

The chieftain let go of the diplomat and snapped his claws in the air again, signalling his tribesmen to seek out rocks that were rich in both prometium and infidium. The Agrippa got to work, sniffing out the rocks that bore these traits and were not irradiated, and then crushing them with their claws to make a glowing powder.

---------------------------------

<Neo Z'traa>

*Xikila observes the landscape: it is indeed a wasteland, with the wreckages of Vrai ships and buildings littering the surface as far as the eye can see*

Xikila: I expect there will be at least one of them out there, master. Some of the structures remain intact. It seems whoever attacked this place did it quickly and aggressively, but not thoroughly. Likely an attack from the air, or from orbit.

---------------------------------

<Malchior IV, Claws camp>

*Muta's recharge cycle is completed, so he transforms back into his normal robot form*

*Muta takes a look around his room and sees that it is now empty, so he walks to Lalli Cain's room*

Muta: Have you seen Etende?

---------------------------------

<Tunisia>

Mike: No. No I don't.

Kakamu: Nice to meet you.

*Kakamu extends a gunmetal hand that Mike hesitantly shakes*

Mike: Uh-huh.

Dave: So, what can we do for you guys?

---------------------------------

<Mordor, GB fortress>

*Koranis growls and pushes past Huriel to walk further into the fortress*

---------------------------------

<Barry's world>

*Linkara walks behind a group of people shuffling along in brown robes and taps one of them on the shoulder*

*The townsman turns around and gasps in surprise upon seeing Linkara*

Townsman: Ah! It is you!

Linkara: You were expecting me?

Townsman: Oh yes, yes! The 90s Kid told us to expect a "boring nerd" in a trilby hat to rescue him! We would have tried to do it ourselves, but we dare not face Barry's pain alone...

JC Denton: He's just a punk. I'll take care of it.

Townsman: ...Are you alright, my son?

*JC Denton is still crawling around on the floor because his legs have not yet been healed*

JC Denton: I'll take my chances.

Seran: Who ees thees 90s Kid, anyway?

Linkara: He's one of the characters on my show, of course! He lives in my closet when I don't need him, but a few weeks ago he disappeared so I had to cancel his sketch.

Spoony: What is it with similar-looking characters all living in closets of eccentric people, anyway?

*Everyone looks confused and turns to the camera. Someone can be heard screaming "NYEEESSSS" in the distance*

---------------------------------

<Meme World, surface>

Hungry-man: fuk off

*Hungry-man turns to walk away from the hologram, but stops when he senses the presence of his old pal, Skelly Bones!*

*He turns back to face the Ayy-Lmaliums, and a single tear falls from his eye*

Hungry-man: ah, wot the hell! me old BONES's down there an' i bet he's missin this meat already!

*Hungry-man grabs his belly and shakes it up and down in front of the hologram*

Hungry-man: beam me down lad or oil 'ave yer spagheti on toast.

<Saskana>

*Blackout catches Cutter*

Blackout: Be careful!

*He lets him go, and then fires a bolt of lightning at Mazkertis*


*The two decoy Ynots flanking the real Ynot are hit by the fists, but the real one dives to avoid them*

*He suddenly slams into Mazkertis from below*

-----

<Mordor>

*IG-88's gun-holding arm falls to the ground, and the droid screeches*

*He suddenly spews a massive jet of flame in the general direction of Hassan from a flame-thrower in his other arm*


*Black Phantom spins round and slams his staff into Eos' elbow, knocking the beam off-course*

BP: You take your hits for granted. That is irrational.

*He swings his staff at Eos' legs, sweeping him off his feet, then creates a gravity field around him to hold him in place*


*Meanwhile, Turel prepares a Punch of Kill Everything to knock out Straxus, but Straxus triggers it early, so it backfires on Turel, knocking him out instead*

*Straxus turns to Figlio and Eos*

-----

<Malchior IV>

*Aster leads Rainn to Branley's office*

*Within, Branley is spinning around in a swivel chair*

Branley: *in a Southern accent* Hey, there. I've been waiting for you.

Aster: How'd you know it was me?

Branley: The last time anyone came in here was seven months ago.

Aster: My condolences. Did you get us on a ship?

Branley: Did anyone follow you?

Aster: At least three men. Why?

Branley: Good, because I got us on thirteen ships.

-----

<Atuar Sadiares>

Nikolai: Work? Um, well, work. We really just sell food here, so not unless you're interested in that.

-----

<The Bat-Cave>

*SB jumps out of bed, standing at attention*

*He runs down the stairs*

F-Blackout: Where's Anarky?

-----

<Neo Z'traa>

*Ricochet drags himself across the scorched earth*

Ricochet: Gah! Gah!

-----

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*Senator Skedaddle "bumps into" Vazquez*

Alan: Oh, Patr! How are you?

*He is holding a newspaper with the headline "WHITE HOUSE STANDS ACCUSED OF SPYING ON OPPOSITION"*

-----

<Saskana>

Malygos turned to Perseus, ruby eyes widening as they fell upon the Red Lantern Energy that powered the maddened Lantern.  This could be bad.  "Calm down," they said, "as you said, we're on the same side.  It was an accident due to Mazkertis's surprising level of strength for a wizard.  Now if you'll excuse me-"

Malygos vanished, appearing before Von Budeberg's ship, an arcane shield up to ward off Mazkertis's blows.  "Your plan is madness, your methodology slaughter.  I would not join you," they said, blasting them with another ray of light, before muttering a word.

"Megaflare."  they uttered, their eyes glowing with blue flame as they stretched out a long-nailed hand, a burst of blue, flame-like energy called down to smite Mazkertis.

---

<Mordor>

"Bastard"  Eos spat, the golden bow reappearing in his hand to fire another arrow of light at Black Phantom.

From behind the skeletal mask, Hassan's eyes widened.  A second too late she springboarded off IG-88's body to dodge the flames...
But it was not entirely successful.  She howled in pain as the flames licked her leg, collapsing into a heap.

---

<Linkit>

The sahagin ambassador nodded, hissing into his communicator as great stones with sapphire engravings were lifted down into the abyss.

As time went by and the production of the portal continued, more and more sahagin were moving to the planet, constructing a grand city out of the stone and steel beneath the waves.  Almost overnight, a significant population there was built up - the reborn world populated not only with the crustacean Agrippa, but the fish-like sahagin that claimed the place now.

---

<Sapsa>

Korr nodded. "I will show you the way," he said.

The ship dived, deep beneath the waves - and it was there the extent of the civilization was revealed. Above the water, it was barren, a seemingly primal planet with few evidence of civilization. Below, grand spires of steel and stone, hooked into the walls of the ocean with ingenious contraptions. Enclosed vehicles moved from place to place, giving a great sense of livelihood to the grand aquatic city. As they moved further and further from the surface, the buildings became darker, more somber, a sense of subtle power built into each of them. At one grand spire with a rune in its front, the two stopped. "You may wish to use an air tank, shorewalker, lest you drown here."

---

<Liquid Metallicon>

Sachiel gave a bright smile. "Oh, of course, Lord Fourteen!" As Fourteen turned away, however, he fingered the knife hidden in his pocket. Bastard thought he could just waltz in here and ask for care, knowing he could go anywhere else? Bloody pirates, think they own everything.

He led Fourteen out of the clinic, through winding passageways until the two of them reached a back, dark alley.

---

<Hyrulean Sector>

A small, personal vessel entered Hyrulean space, heading towards one of the major planets.

It had two inhabitants, both women. One, was a tall, stately elven woman with wavy, dark purple, almost black hair in a short bob, and deep, violet eyes. Her skin was a slate blue. She wore a low-cut, dark blue bilaud and fine pants and shoes, and a pair of rimless square glasses on her face. The other was much shorter, only reaching up to her elven companion's chest. She had deep blue eyes with slitted pupils, like those of a cat - and ears and a long tail also reminiscent of one. Her hair - and the fur on her tail - was a very light pink, almost white, done into short braids down the side of her face. Her hair was longer than her companion's, albeit still not long. She wore a deep blue robe with a fur collar, fastned with a silver clasp.

Their greatest different, however, was in manner. Where the elf was calm and compose, her companion was excited, energetic, her sharp teeth bared in a smile. "Isn't this exciting, Nimie?" she asked. "I've been wanting to go to Hyrule for a long time, and now we're finally going there! Imagine the great things we'll learn this time!"

Nimie chuckled. "Calm down, Lyhia, we're barely there yet." She hailed the customes port on the station they were approaching. "Hello, we are Nimie Valeroyant and K'lyhia of Eorzea, asking for permission to enter Hyrule."

<Malchior IV, Bourba City>

*Asled gets up and growls*

Asled: "There's no fighting here! I've had enough of the insanity of this week! My brother Asved would have stopped it long ago. Perhaps I should follow his example!"

*He puts up his fists*

---

<A restaurant on BZPB, the User World>

*Asved silently weeps, as he senses Yon's death. He silently hopes that our one eyed hero will return.*

---

<Neo-Z'Traa>

Caiaphus: "Orbital bombardment....with no survivors?"

*The Makuta see a lone Vrai scavenger in the distance*

Caiaphus: "Approach him."

*The Vrai immediately takes out two machetes, and charges at the others*

???: "Je vais vous détruire!"

---

<Malchior IV, Claws camp>

*Lalli Cain enters*

Lalli Cain: "No. I assume she's in the other bedroom."

*Klak wakes up*

Me: Good morning, Malchior IV.

---

<Tunisia>

D-Klak: "Judging by what you're wearing, I assume you're men who have access to a lot of resources! Do you know where we may find a spaceship?"

*Bob steps out of the portal*

Bob: "Hi! I'm Toa Bob!"

---

<Mordor, GB fortress>

Huriel: "Where are you going?!"

*He chases after Koranis*

Huriel: "Stop!"

---

<Barry's world>

Doug: "Well, that was weird. Spanha, this sounds like your territory."

Dr. Pavel: "That was not friendly."

Paul Latza: "Dr. Bedge, can't you heal Denton?"

Dr. Bedge: "I'll need a medkit."

Malcolm: "Uh, villager, do you know where we can get a medkit?"

Linkara: "I suppose we'll need to gather our strength before we take on Bring-The-Pain-Barry. Who is he, anyway?"

Bedge: "An evil, cruel man. I've heard that he has a twin brother who is a kind old man, but Barry....he brings the pain. Thankfully, he refuses to make jokes about my wife, unlike a certain former wrestler."

Spoony: ".....that doesn't really help us out."

*Dr. Bedge and Spoony stare at each other*

---

<Mordor>

*Figlio raises his staff and points it at Straxus*

Figlio: "Are your servers able to comprehend the feeling of wonder, robot? Of utter awe?"

---

<Malchior IV>

Rainn: "Brilliant, Mr. Branley. My name is Rainn, Rainn Sulrai. Interesting accent."

---

<The Bat-Cave>

*Rahn is still brushing his teeth*

*Julio shrugs as he walks up to F-Blackout*

Julio: "I haven't seen him all morning."

---

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*Senator Vazquez smiles*

Patr: "How've you been, Alan? Say, you don't actually believe what they're saying about me, do you?"

---

<Malchior IV, White House>

*President Howard adjusts his tie. His wife massages his shoulders and smiles*

Her Excellency, The First Lady of Malchior IV: "Go get them, tiger."

*President Howard nods, and walks out of his sleeping quarters. Several Secret Service agents surround him, along with his Chief of Staff and Press Secretary. They start discussing a possible statement on the recent news*

---

<Liquid Metallicon, Alleys>

*A ghostly Liquid Metalliconite pas*

--

<Liquid Metallicon, Ozar's Spire>

*Ozar looks out the window, and spots Akzer. His eyes narrow as he glares at his relative.*

--

<Liquid Metallicon, Pub>

*Akzer happens to look around, and sees Ozar from afar*

Akzer: "Listen, Raigen, give me a call later. I have to go."

*He gives Raigen a card, and dashes towards the spire*

---

<Saskana>

*Perseus grimaces at Malygos*

*Ynot slams into Mazkertis. They fly into the air, meaning that Blackout's bolt of lightning hits the energy spire instead, and Captain Eurobeat's bullets completely miss the wizard. Malygos summons the Megaflare, and Mazkertis quickly grabs Ynot and throws him at the fire, attempting to smite the Makuta. Some of the flames fall onto his cloak, and he dives towards the water to extinguish them. Mazkertis then floats up to Captain Eurobeat. The User feels someone entering his mind to communicate telepathically with him*

Mazkertis: "I am not the source of darkness in this universe! You have been misled! Your precious Klak is the cause of all of this."

Spotter: "Starscream, do you have a sniper rifle? We can hit him from afar!"

*Perseus catches the falling Cutter with his ring, and floats towards the wizard. D-Klak (4) and Axalara are out of the water, and are being carried by Moe (who is disguised as a large bird). D-Klak (4) screams at everyone who is fighting Mazkertis*

D-Klak (4): "WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T LET HIM TOUCH YOU!"

<Malchior IV, Claws camp>

Muta: Acknowledged.

*Muta leaves the room in search of Etende and eventually finds her in the other bedroom, drinking coffee from a flask*

Etende: Morning! How's your leg?

Muta: It is functioning well, thank you.

Etende: Yeah, I can see that. Your maker built you well!

Muta: Yes... he did.

*Muta turns to leave, but cannot bring himself to: instead, he stands facing the doorway for a moment before turning back*

Muta: I lost my memories in a collision many years ago. Perhaps the same has happened to you?

Etende: I'm sorry?

Muta: Your name is Etende Rhaloff. You were born to Darren and Kath Rhaloff in 149,953 CMT. You met my creator in the University of Technology in Valdajoa twenty years later. You gave input as to my design, specifically the kinetic magnetizers in my hands and head.

Etende: The hell are you talking about? I never knew my parents, never mind went to a bloody university!

Muta: I do not understand. I remember you well.

Etende: What.. oh, wait, I know what's going on here. Kakamu asked you to do some background research on us before you got here, and you hit the ground outside pretty hard, so your databanks got all scrambled. Give me an hour and I can fix that.

Muta: That will not be necessary.

*Muta runs a self-diagnostic program - but the results turn up negative*

Muta: I... will consult the others.

*Muta walks out into the camp in the hope that Kakamu has returned, but finds that he has not*

*While waiting, Muta thinks over recent events and the implications of Etende's possible memory loss*

---------------------------------

<Tunisia>

Dave: Eh, we have the essentials. Food, clothes, water... guns... ballistic armor... et cetera. There's no spaceship here, but there is a Stargate back at base camp under heavy guard.

Mike: We could take you back there, but unless we radio in with a description of you first, they'll shoot you the second you cross those orange markers out in the middle of the f##king desert.

Dave: Well... go on then.

Mike: Me? Hell no, I need this job! You do it, but make it clear it has nothing to do with me.

Dave: Spoilsport.

*Dave takes a walkie-talkie out of his pocket and speaks into it*

Dave: Base camp, this is alpha-gamma-one-two on patrol. A whole group of aliens just appeared right in front of us, I'm assuming through the exit point of the island, over?

*The radio crackles as base camp responds*

???: What is this, some kind of joke? Only one person can leave the island at a time.

Dave: Well then, they formed an orderly queue and came out one by one!

???: ...Bring them over.

*Dave switches the radio off and throws his backpack over his shoulder*

Dave: Alright, let's get moving.

*Dave climbs over the first sand dune, gesturing for the others to follow him*

*On the horizon, about a mile away, a large military camp can be seen*

---------------------------------

<Neo Z'traa>

*Xikila raises her palms and uses Magnetism to make the scavenger's machetes fly out of his hands and into hers*

---------------------------------

<Barry's world>

Townsman: We have a surgeon! I'm sure he can remove those legs for you and replace them with a nice new pair of wooden ones. They're the new fashion!

*JC Denton stares at him blankly for a moment, then turns around and starts crawling in the other direction*

*The Townsman then lays eyes on Spanha - because she is the only non-human in the group, he reacts rather suddenly, screaming and putting his hands on his mouth*

Townsman: What is that?! Never have I seen such a thing in all of Kråvenhold!

Spanha: I'm the cheese monster. Give me your cheese!

*The townsman screams again and runs away*

Doug: Well, that was useless... wait, look!

*Doug points to the roof of a nearby barn, where a gryphon can be seen eating a piece of orange fabric*

*Upon seeing the joke characters, the gryphon's eyes widen and it flies away*

Doug: Stop it!

Linkara: With what?

Spoony: I'm gonna get you!

*Spoony prepares to take off, but Dr. Bedge puts his hand on his shoulder to stop him*

Dr. Bedge: We don't need to! Mortimer is probably in the barn. That piece of orange fabric it was eating looks like it came from one of our jumpsuits.

*Suddenly, crashing noises and maniacal laughter can be heard coming from within the barn*

*The crowd of villagers disperses, with everyone running back to their homes*

Townsman: Oh, the pain! He brings the pain!!

< Sapsa >

"I'll be fine." replied Sefer. "And by the way, I'm no more a shorewalker than you are." she added, with a faint smile. "I'm a Spacenoid. I was born on the Merkava - a starship. It wasn't until my adolescence that I felt gravity's pull for the first time. To be honest, I've never really gotten used to it. The point is, though, that I'm about as big a fan of Terra Firma as your people seem to be."

She turned, inspecting the underwater city from the view screen of the ship.

"It's certainly true that those who are born to gaze up at the heavens every night will strive to reach towards them. But for those who are born too far away to see them... I suppose such people must create a paradise all of their own." she remarked, before turning to face Korr.  "Thank you for your help." she added, before disappearing in a violent burst of red light, and reappearing within the grand spire.

< Saskana, Orbit, The Assault Shadow >

"My Lord!" cried out one of the bridge crew. "Our sensors are reporting a small-scale, yet highly intense battle on the surface. It's highly likely Blackout and Malygos have descended from their ships."

Ascheron grinned. "In that case, we can wipe out two of our most dangerous enemies, and cripple both the Dominion and ZFT, in a single blow. Prepare the Ignatus."

The crew were stunned at his request, with some even turning to face him. He was serious. A few seconds later, the crew recognized this, and began inputting commands frenziedly into their consoles. Warning sirens sounded throughout the ship as it went to full battle stations, the lights dimming. Within the firing chamber of the ship's Mass Accelerator Cannon, a spear-like object was lowered into place, held in the center of the chamber via gravitational locks. The ship's hull unfolded, revealing solar mirrors located underneath the heavy armored plating of the ship, which expanded far around the ship, reflecting light to a point just behind the bridge. This light was funneled through to the firing chamber, where it was reflected onto the tip of the spear, which began to glow. Lightning crackled around the spear as heavy physical shielding slid into place around the chamber, protecting the rest of the ship from electromagnetic interference generated by the Ignatus weapon. Soon, it would contain the power of small sun, and would be able to ignite the entire atmosphere of the planet, killing every living thing on it. Ascheron grinned, as the mechanical thrum of the conduits powering the weapon echoed throughout the ship.

"Thirty minutes to full charge." announced one of the bridge crew, as a countdown appeared on the ship's view screens.

"All crew to AA positions!" shouted Ascheron, sweeping his arm forwards. "We've exposed the hull completely to charge this weapon, and we need to defend the ship until it's ready to fire. Sieg Luria!"

"Sieg Luria!" replied the bridge crew, in unison.

< Saskana >

"Ngeh~?! Klak is the source of all this fighting, you say? It's a shame that we live in a universe where people can't trust themselves, let alone others... but I'm utterly resolved to my beliefs, Mazkertis. If Klak proves himself to be a source of hatred, then I shall have to fight him... but in this moment, all I can see is that you're responsible for the conflict on this world!"

He aimed his gun and fired again.

< Malchior IV >

Altero sped through the streets, only half focused on the driving. On the passenger's seat sat a laptop, with a list of companies; 108 in total. Allying himself with Assassins Sans Frontieres to gain the information about Sefer Yetzirah - the mysterious woman who had been seen in Gabriel Ascheron's company before the Republic's fall - had been a risky move, but it had paid off. He tapped in a few commands, and the names of companies on the list lit up red - save for the very first one listed. He frowned.

"All fake companies? They're just fronts for her organization... apart from this one." he said, opening the data file for the company labelled 'Defense Industries Organization'. Reels of text appeared on his screen, which he quickly read, taking a corner.  "Defense Industries Organization, huh? I had a feeling DIO would be behind all this. And to think it's just a front for the Shinsengumi..."

At this, a Mclaren SLR emerged from a junction, impacting the side of Altero's car and throwing it off the road. It spun through the air, as the driver's side window of the Mclaren rolled down, and the barrel of a Denel NTW-20 anti-materiel rifle slid out of it, all whilst the car was still drifting. The barrel tracked Altero's car as it rolled through the air, until its fuel tank was exposed, at which point it fired. Altero's car exploded, killing him instantly, and creating a massive fireball. The driver of the Mclaren stepped calmly out of it, somehow unaffected by momentum as it span away, again, still drifting, and crashed into the burning wreck of Altero's car, itself exploding.

Lucrezia "Adonai" Sephirah II, or to use her more common, but by no means more preferred moniker, "Lu-Lu Seph-Seph", pulled a cigarette from her blazer, which was lit by the falling embers of the collision. She pressed it between her lips, before pulling a phone from her blazer. The case was embossed with the Shinsengumi logo, but with a β present within the right hexagon. She pressed a button, and held it to her ear.

"Vance Vangelis. You don't know me..."

She walked away from the burning wrecks, as a secondary explosion behind her lit up the entire street, yet somehow left her hair completely unaffected.

"...But you're about to."

She ended the call, pocketing the phone. She entered a MacDaniel on the other side of the street, pushing past Dreis, and walking up to the counter.

[Dekan]
The We'd Warriors weren't really sure what was happening. It was like the whole battle froze in place, the battleship ceased attacking, the weird fockin wizard just stopped casting spells. Old Man Ross just shrugged, confused as everyone else. Wal Wal then walked over to Ross.
"You've summoned the We'd Warriors for nothing! We've came out of hiding for nothing! The battle has ceased to continue."
Old Man Ross puffed a big smoke from his pipe, then blew it out. "My . Niger you got the all mistaken." Ross then pulled out his EyePhone to call his one and only. Niger.
-----------
[Hell]
Niflheim was unsurprised at the ruler's request. It's not like it's the first time he's dealt with pretentious, egotistical rulers. "Nothing. I have nothing. Why in the FOCK would I have anything to give you when I came here by accident? If you won't give me a free pass, I'll get out myself."
-----------
[Rhadan]
Nightfall had arrived. The two suns were finally resting, the onslaught of radiation and heat ceasing. When night time arrived, the majority of the population recruited into their crowded homes or into the underground catacombs and city. A time like this was perfect to strike. The catacombs were filled and there would be minimum complications from the guards.
Sinjon then closed up his shop for the day. He gave out the leftover food to anyone that wanted it, as he always did. He then informed Rahat he would be gone tonight, and to look over the shop. Rahat nodded, agreeing.
Going to the back of the shop, he started gathering his supplies. He pressed a button under a basket, revealing a secret door in the ground. Originally a fallout shelter or a place to hide people, Sinjon had expanded it to be a storage unit for his illegal weaponry.
He got all his bombs, grenades, his armor, his mask, and his original repeating rifle. Armed to the teeth under his cloths, he then opened a hatch to exit the room through a dug-out tunnel, and not back up to the building.
Arriving at the end of the tunnel to another hatch, Sinjon opened it. Infront of him was the vast complex of the underground city in the catacombs. It was rustling with energy now, making it much easier for him to blend in with the shady groups that participated in this horrendous lie of a city. Sinjon just walked with the crowds to the designated area where he would meet the rest of his. Nigers
------
In the palace, Gaon continued watching his SpacehoopZ. But, suddenly, he began to choke. He rolled off his hover cart(which doubled as his bed). He began hacking and gagging, spitting up blood at random intervals.
Doug then arrived into his room. He stood over Gaon in his pain, staring at him.
"P-pluhees-" Gaon hacked up more blood. "D o u g . . ."
Doug gave him a grimacing look. "Haha Just saying." Doug stared at Gaon, going into convulsions and cardiac arrest now, foam coming out of his mouth as the blood proceeded to clot in his throat, making him choke even more.
"W h y . . . ?" Gaon asked
"fatass ugly shut the fuq up." Doug then slam jammed onto Gaon's stomach to put him into shock and cough up the clotted blood. He wouldn't die yet.
------
All of the rebel. Nigers had met up in the area below the palace. It was quite a vast group, numbering in the hundreds. Sinjon then spoke up.
"You guys have brought all the explosives, then?" The group unanimously all said "Yes."
"Then let's get to work."
Unloading all their explosives and wires, they began to put them together with some flammable type of putty. Extremely makeshift and unsafe, the group had no other options after Gaon's forces seized their military-grade explosives a few weeks back.
Wot proceeded to use his grappling hooks and attach them to the ceiling, which was the bottom of the palace. Along with Wolol, Ajak, Dut, Wuow, Wal, and Kon, they began moving the explosives to the top and attaching them to the ceiling. It was a dangerous job, they were wide open to attack and were climbing ropes with no safety equipment.
After about half an hour of doing this, the group was getting tired. They switched shifts to others to climb.
------
Far away, some of Gaon's guards were on break and at the bar. They had been drinking heavily and attempting to molest some of the women with their higher status as an excuse. One of the guards who wasn't drunk, Kok Daw, looked outside. He noticed the group climbing up the ropes and doing something.
"Ayy, guys, come look! See what these crazies are doing!" The drunk guards stumbled out and started laughing, thinking it outlandish nonsense, some kind of suicidal risk takers. Kok Daw then pulled out his binoculars and scoped the climbers.
"Hey...wait a minute! They're setting up bombs! It's those rebels!"
"Man kok you are one crazy guy...here, give me those." Tree Tree took the binoculars and stumbled over himself, but got up and looked through them. His pupils widened and he then focused. "W i l l s o n . . ."
-----------
[Meme World, Surface]
The Ayy-Lmaliums thanked the group. "Now, here are the coordinates. They're not that far from your position. Infact, it appears Hungry-man is already on his way." The group then proceeded to chase after Hungry-man.
In the rocks, LeTrole Ruseman rubbed his hands together, for he just thought of a master plan. He pulled out a banana peel and laughed, throwing it infront of Hungry-man.
"Now WOT in the FOCK...?!" Hungry-man slipped and fell on his back. The group was surprised, but CIA noticed the laughing in the back. He ran over and pulled out his pistol to LeTrole Ruseman.
"Was getting caught part of your plan?"
"No!"
"Now what's the next step of your master plan?"
"Distracting you. "
Hassan kicked him in the head, KOing him. "Don't Ever Say that again."
"Now ye fockers need to stop buggin' around and lets get goin!"
-----------
[Meme World, Underground]
BONES fell over in exhaustion. Now, how an animated skeleton gets exhausted is beyond me. Infact, this whole situation is nonsense, but that's besides the point.
The rest of the Dongers began waking up. Jesse Ventura awoke first; "What the hell...? The whole thing ended without us!" Ross Mandell awoke next, having heard Jesse's nonsense. "It seems their time has come! The Mask sits on the ground, over there!"
One Punch Man then dashed and picked up The Mask, looking at the carnage around the place. He simply responded as he always did: "Ok"
Ainsley Harriott then saw the stone hand on the ground. "Well I'm not sure what happened...but it seems we won, if the smell of that hand is truley Tommy Wiseau's."
Billy Mays noticed that BONES' suit had been stuck in the wall, destroyed. "Guys, it seems that the offer of the Dong Squad is over. Where the hell is BONES?!"
"He seems to be here, he fell in battle." Soldier pointed towards the skeleton on the ground, whether it was alive or dead, was, well, irrelevant.
"But where is everyone else? Have they died too?" Merasmus then scanned the place for Yon and the others with his magical staff, but detected nothing.
"It...it seems they're gone. I can't find their bodies or life force at all."
The rattling of some bones began to speak: "T...that's because they died."
The group was mostly surprised. "BONES! You're...alive as a skeleton can be!" Soldier began to cry and picked up BONES. Pumkin was the only one unamused; just standing around on the lookout for any other enemies. His stomach growled; he was obviously very hungry. But then he heard another stomach growl, distant away. Another pumkin? "But how?" he thought.
Then, bursting through the cavern entrance above, Hungry-man arrived. His hunger wave-lengths bounced off Pumkin.
"Wot?! Another man with a hunger to match?! I'll be damned..." Hungry-man then saw his old friend, Skelly Bones, in the arms of Soldier.
"BONES!!!! Well, if it ain't me oldest m80"
"H-hungry-man?!"
Hungry-man then went over and picked up BONES. "Me BONES..."
"W-what are you doing here?"
"Savin' you, ol m8."
Hungry-man picked up BONES in his arms and began walking towards the exit.
"W-wait....Hungry-man. Tell the group to secure The Mask." He nodded in agreement, sad and distressed. Hungry-man turned around to talk to the group. "Now all ya focks better 'ave 'eard that! Get that FOCKIN Mask and let's get out of here! Those little green alien men are the ones who sent me 'an me mates to find ya!"
One-Punch Man then responded. "It's already secured."
'oh'
Hungry-man then began the walk again. The rest of the team was somewhat recovered and stood around the battlegrounds. They had a moment of silence for their presumed deceased comrades. The Heckler then shed a tear, for all the hecks given over pointless deaths. The group then moved on, following behind Hungry-man.
Hungry-man exited the cavern with the rest of the crash team outside. He held BONES in his arms as if he was dead(technically he was). BONES has lost many bones anyways, his fingers, some of his legs and arms, a few ribs...he was pretty much incomplete. The magic that had been holding him together was failing.
------
Up on the spaceship, the Ayy-Lmaliums had picked up the squad leaving the cave. "We got a lock, sir!"
"Ayy, let's go then. Full speed! Their injuries could be severe." The ship went full speed through the memes.
------
Jesse Ventura picked up his EyePhone to contact the ship. They answered immediately: "We're already on the way, Ventura! What's the status?!"
"We've lost a lot. BONES is losing his life. We've lost Yon, Shrek, The Hand, and See-Man. BONES would have the full report, if he lives."
"And what of the other team we hired?"
"They're helping us stabilize. They're escorting BONES and helping the other members stay on their feet."
"Thanks, Ventura. You're now promoted to squad leader under my order. Do your job well, Soldier. The ETA is 10 minutes."
Ventura was honored, but surprised. After Yon's death it was obvious he would be the one to be promoted, just not immediately.
"Alright everyone, get to secure positions and hold it down! We got five minutes before the ship arrives to pick us up. And I'm sure Wiseau couldn't have been the only Memer in his master plan!"
And so the group set up their positions. The injured were secured behind the alien rocks and bushes, which really didn't look like either of those. Vivid, colorful, and shapes that shouldn't be in nature. Some of them seemed as if they were molded clay. Who knows, really? Meme World was an odd place.
------
Ten minutes passed. No one came to attack. No one came to bother them. Even LeTrole Rusemann had left the scene, to honor his dead Memers. The Ayy-Lmalium ship then arrived and beamed down the medical squad with stretchers.
"Ayy, everyone injured, put them on board!" The medical team quickly moved out, and so did the Dongers. They carried BONES on the stretcher, and the crash team moved the injured Dongers to them. The medical team beamed them up, while the crash team and uninjured Dongers(Jesse Ventura, OPM, and Shell-Shocked Cat) stayed down. Soon enough, Ayy beamed down to talk to them.
"Crash survivors, here is your monetary compensation for your assistance."
TTT, Bateman, CIA, Hungry-man, Mr. Blobby, TFPOFF, TGWWEIM, Car Guard, John Freeman, Caged Gorilla and some Happy People then stepped up to receive their $$$
"But, before you go...I have an offer for all of you. Join this team. We need all the help we can get. You'd be saving the universe. Even if you refuse, as part of the offer, we're still sending a team to fix your spaceship."

<The Hangar bay of The Kusanagi>

Calm spun the katana in his hand, feeling the weight and build. Perfect craftmanship. How could I expect anything less from a frivolous showoff such as this one? He stepped back, stretching his fore leg out and bending the rear. He pointed at Kira with his left hand, arm outstretched, and lay the flat of the katana on his arm.

"Let us commence."

Kira stepped toward him, twirling his katana blindingly quickly, but remained casual, his arms by his sides, his stance neutral. Calm remained placid, completely still and unwavering. Kira stopped a pace ahead of Calm's outstretched finger. His katana still spun madly around his fingers, for five seconds, ten, twenty. The swords flashed as they hung in the air, two more sliding from their sheaths. The blades crossed, the airborne katana sliding back into their sheaths unguided, the two freshly drawn crossing and severing the air where Calm's arm used to be. Calm swept low, swinging the sword in a low cut at Kira's ankles. The swordsman jumped, pirouetting through the air - flipping directly over Calm - who rolled onto his back and spun, batting away Kira's cuts with his wooden sandals. The monk pushed off from the floor, using his momentum in a downward slash that Kira deflected with an angled blade. The force of the cut dragged Calm down with it, and when the tip of the katana lodged in the metal floor he leapt and swung himself about on the sword, kicking both feet at Kira. Such an unorthodox manoeuvre pushed the swordsman off balance, and he dropped his katana, but he kicked it back into his hand before it even touched the floor. The blade began spinning again, flipping around his knuckles as Calm settled back into his stance.

"You leave me no choice," The swordsman smirked. "I had hoped not to show you this."

------------------------

<Malchior IV, Bourba City

Dreis leaps toward the lead man, twisting in the air to avoid his punch and bringing a knee up past his arm, battering him out of the way. He swing a punch at the second man, who dodges, and Dreis spins, flicking his butterfly knife out to nick him on the cheek.

"Come on then." Dreis spat with a grin.


-----------------------

<Atuar Sedieres, A/N's shop>

Ray: Hey no worries, just let me know. I'm in the area if something comes up. [Addressing the Terugan] Want me to show you that ship or are you set?

<Saskana>

*Ynot just barely flies out of the way of the Megaflare*

Ynot: There's too many of us! We're getting in each other's way!

Blackout: So leave!

*He fires a shadow bolt at Mazkertis, and Ynot follows up with two iron javelins*


*Starscream throws his hands in the air*

Starscream: I'm a Makuta, and a flier! What use would I have for a sniper rifle?

---

*Predictably, both the Pale Fire and the Cabana Prime notice the warship targeting the battlefield with a WMD*

*The two flagships open fire with everything they've got, and the squadron of Saskanan fighters soon join in*

-----

<Mordor>

*Straxus gives Figlio a blank look*

Straxus: Negative.

*He walks up to IG-88, and pulls Hassan's daggers out of his shoulders, freeing him*


*IG-88 emits a sound which could almost barely be described as a chuckle*

*He fires the flamethrower again, sweeping it in a wide arc*


*Black Phantom skillfully dodges the arrow, and fires a plasma bolt at Eos*

-----

<Malchior IV>

Branley: I know. So, I got us on thirteen ships. We're listed on the passenger manifests of twelve of those under easily guessable fake names. Jones' men will probably investigate all twelve, just in case. Meanwhile, the thirteenth ship, the one we will actually be on, is some CEO's personal shuttle, which I managed to steal the access codes for. No passenger manifest for that one. So, where are we going?

*Aster looks at Rainn*

-----

<The Bat-Cave>

F-Blackout: Strange. He better come back soon, I can't have my troops walking off the base whenever they feel like it.

-----

<Malchior IV, Senate>

Alan: I don't know what to believe, Patr. But don't worry. *pats him on the back* I'm not judging.

*He walks away*

-----

<Liquid-Metallicon>

*F-Blackout is drinking a pint*

<Stouttish Islands>

The Stouttish Islands were completely silent. Normally, even when everyone was asleep, there would still be some distorted screaming in the background if you listened hard enough - but now? Nothing. This is partly the fault of Lord Zrintch, of course, who dropped by last year to pick up the island's most prestigious inhabitants to group them into a team to save the universe - and most of the rest couldn't resist taking off to see Kartouche's Moosical Extravaganza on Tybion. And we all know what happened to them.

Well then, what are we doing here? Who is there left to care about? These were the thoughts of one man still at home, gazing out the window at the empty landscape with his father sat in the sofa behind him... ah yes. His father. A balding man with a white neck brace and a blue Tony the Tiger t-shirt who did nothing but slag people off all day.

"Dad... it's real empty outside." The son said, wondering if his dad was even listening. Unfortunately, he was.

"Mm-hm."

"I wonder what Dennis is doing way out there," the son said, trying to make conversation. "Probably something important."

"It's easy for Dennis to give a shit, cause Dennis is so full of SHIT!", his father replied

The son rolled his eyes but continued to make conversation. "Uh... so... when are you gonna be part of that team? What did they call it... the Dong Squad?"

"I'm not. They called me yesterday and said I was 'bumped'."

"Oh... that's a shame."

"You're goddamn fucking right it is!"

-------

Meanwhile, in orbit, something was happening. Space folded in on itself, tearing apart and making way for a fleet of ships from the other side of the universe. A dozen of them, all looking like this, emerged from the breach and descended into the atmosphere. One of the ships performed an atmospheric scan and another scanned for lifeforms. After the scans were completed, and they found that there were only around ten lifeforms here, on a planet that is similar to Earth, the captain of the latter ship decided that something was wrong.

"What the hell happened here? The monitor's showing signs of civilization from all over... houses and bridges, hell, even a mansion! Why are there so few signs of life?"

"I don't know, sir! Maybe some sort of contagion hit them hard?"

"Hmm... I doubt it. Computer says it's safe to breathe outside so if there was a virus, it definitely wasn't airborne. Broadcast our normal greeting message to the surface. See if anyone responds."

"Copy that."

-------

Suddenly, the Tourettes Guy's phone started ringing, causing him to slam his arms down in frustration.

"HOLY SHIT! Gotta answer the damn phone."

He then picked it up and listened to the message.

"Attention citizens of [STOUTTISH ISLANDS]. This is the New York Police Department of Planet Earth. We are en route to your location in search of a wanted criminal. If necessary, we will search your homes for this criminal, [ROSS H. MANDELL], as justified by charter F, section 3c under intergalactic law. Failure to comply with our search will result in disciplinary measures, and anyone found housing this criminal will be arrested and taken back to face justice on Earth."

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!"

Tourettes Guy then slammed the phone down... and realized what he just said. "OH SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! SHIIIIIT!"

"What's the matter, dad?"

"We gotta get our asses outta here, or we're gonna have SHIT! TO DRINK!"

Tourettes Guy then pushed himself out of the chair and started fumbling with his beige trenchcoat (the one he uses to imitate the host of Unsolved Mysteries). After putting it on successfully, he swung the door open and ran down the steps of his porch. Noticing this commotion, his son walked to the door and called after him.

"Dad! Where are you going?!"

"To the ass-end of the Stouttish Islands, that's where!"

"Wait for m-"

"Fuck you kid you're a dick!"

And with that, the Tourettes Guy climbed in his car and sped down the road. Looking in his rear-view mirror, he could see one of the flying cop cars land on the road behind him and give chase.

"OH BOB SAGET!"

One of the policemen in the car then pulled out a megaphone and shouted at him to pull over, but the Tourettes Guy knew that couldn't be done. He was already wanted for verbally assaulting everyone at Comcast and making several death threats, so even if he did pull over he'd still be arrested. Instead, he stuck his head out the window, looked the policeman in the eyes, and said what had to be said.

"Why don't you make like a banana, and SHIT!"

However, this attempt at scaring the policeman off didn't work, and only made things worse. Because he wasn't looking where he was going, the Tourettes Guy's car crashed into a tree, and he flew through the windshield and rolled over the grass nearby. While spewing a string of words too obscene for me to write even without the word filter, the Tourettes Guy shook the glass out of his neck brace and the policeman stepped out to arrest him.

"Jesus, buddy, what the hell've you done to run like that?" The policeman said, and grabbed the Tourettes Guy by the arm. He was quickly punched in the face by the other arm and sent stumbling back against the wreckage of the Guy's car. He touched his nose, and after seeing blood on his fingers, decided to call for backup. He took out his radio, and was about to alert his associates, when he was frozen in place by a voice that sends fear into the most hardened joke characters everywhere. A slightly overweight man with long, brown hair stepped out of the shadows to face him. Light reflected off the golden medallion that was worn around his neck. The policeman backed away in terror, but that didn't stop the stranger from blasting pepper-spray right into his eyes as he said those words again.

"DON'T... CALL... ANYBODY!"

--------------------------------

<Atuar Sadiares>

Zae swallowed the last of her fish, thought it over one last time, then nodded eagerly at Ray.

"Yes! Long time since last ship. Your ship is great, I think," she said.

It seemed that Zae still wasn't making much sense, a fact that nobody wanted to inform her of in case they seemed rude. Oblivious, Zae put her backpack back on and climbed out of her seat to stand next to Ray. "Show the Ray, way!"

As the two turned to leave the shop, two other figures barged in through the door. Zae recognized them as fellow Terugans Kek and Lel... the ones who's ship she snuck on to escape Teruga Prime. Fortunately, her stealth skills meant that neither of them had spotted her entering or leaving the ship, so as far as they were concerned, they hadn't met her yet. Both of them still wore their white uniforms: the ones with silver badges in the shape of their old starship. Zae also noticed a small, orange-skinned, rubbery-looking alien being held in a baby carrier strapped to Lel's chest. It clearly did not appear to be comfortable, as it was struggling against the straps and kicking Lel in the stomach.

"Lemme go!" The alien shouted as it kicked Lel again, causing him to giggle.

"Ooh, that tickles! Do it again."

The alien drummed its fists against him, but nothing happened. "You'll have to do better than that, baby," Lel laughed.

"I'm not a baby!" The creature replied, but Lel simply laughed again.

Zae looked left to right, wondering if she should intervene. Kek, apparently, was thinking the same.

"Lel, shut the baby up! Its voice isn't funny anymore," Kek said.

"I would if I could, man, it just won't stop!"

Kek groaned and approached the counter, looking past Amy and Nikolai at the food they had on display in various fridges. His eye caught a tin of six sardines in the fridge next to Amy's head.

"Hey, do you like sardines?" Kek asked the orange alien. It did not respond, so Kek took that as a yes. He turned back around and stared at the sardines again. Amy looked worried, and asked him if he wanted something, but Kek interrupted her mid-sentence.

"Please, don't don't offer me anything. I'll tell you what I want."

There was an awkward silence, during which Kek stared at the sardines for a moment before continuing. "You know how you got the six-piece sardines?"

"Yes."

"Just, uh... can you gimme just four sardines?"

"I'm afraid I c-"

"SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO MY ORDER," Kek shouted, leaning over the counter and pointing a demanding finger at Amy. "Take the six sardines, and throw two of them AWAY."

< The Kusanagi >

Kira threw his twin katanas in the air, drawing two more, spinning them around his index finger. The two he threw in the air landed, hilt-first, on the other side of his index finger to the katanas he had just drawn, and he began spinning these. He posed confidently as the katanas whipped around his fingers like helicopter blades, or double-bladed lightsabers. He jumped towards Cassius, who could barely withstand the onslaught, taking a step back with seemingly every impact. The huge, vault-like door of the reactor room opened automatically as Cassius closed in, releasing a wave of scalding fog, which quickly filled the cargo bay. Only the sparks of the blade impacts was visible from the balcony where Lilith stood, her Stand at the ready. Only My Railgun, which had the ability to appear as any firearm, real or fictional, had taken the appearance of a Barret M82 - with a completely white finish, a blue glow emanating from the vents on the fore-grip and the muzzle, and a faint white steam rising from the end of the barrel. She tracked Cassius's location through the smoke, Only My Railgun's scope revealing his heat signature, but lost him as he and Kira took their fight into the reactor room itself.

The room was circular, roughly the size of the cargo hold, but with a huge, towering core which hummed with energy. The inner core was a transparent cylinder containing a wealth of glowing red energy, but this was shrouded in a heavy metallic outer core, roughly 15cm thick, which prevented most of the light from escaping; the exception to this was the forward panel, which had a 2m tall Sephirot cut out, allowing the red energy to flood the room.

The bulkhead slammed shut after the two entered, still clashing blades. Kira grinned, and allowed his control of the blades to falter, as they flew away from him, three of them embedding themselves in the bulkhead behind them, with the final being caught by him and sheathed. This was only for an instant, as he jumped forwards, drawing his two remaining katanas from either side of his waist, his longcoat billowing out about him as he did. He came down towards Cassius, who blocked, his foot loosing towards Kira to kick him back, though Kira jumped back from it before it could impact. He confidently twirled both katanas on one finger, passing them to his other hand behind his back, before resuming his attack. He held the spinning blades above him, bringing them down towards Cassius; it was an artfully executed attack, but incredibly pointless, as it left him completely exposed. Cassius swung his Katana towards Kira's stomach, and the latter swordsman grinned, swinging his leg up and kicking off the cutting edge of Cassius's blade, loosing his own katanas. They swung around eachother, joined at the base by a small locking mechanism Kira had activated whilst passing them behind him. They flew upwards, and cut through a heavy metal cable hanging from the roof of the core room, between returning to Kira, who caught them, holding them both in a reverse grip.

Cassisus prepared to counterattack, but was promptly crushed by a falling steamroller, which had previously been secured to the roof of the core room by a heavy metal cable. Kira waited for his hearing to resume, before chuckling, sheathing his Katanas.

"You were pretty good."

At that, a pair of huge, black hands burst forth from the floor, grabbing hold of Kira's ankles. Cassius pulled himself up from underneath the ground using Kira's legs, emerging from the ground in a shower of sparking cabling, metallic fragments and smoke. Time seemed to slow as Cassius' face passed millimeters away from Kira's - the monk was angry, his heavy brow contorted into a scowl, whilst Kira was hesitant, yet clearly impressed.

"U 2!"

Cassius flew into the air, arcing backwards, and landed, spinning his Katana. Kira drew his, doing the same. He realized what had happened - instead of being flattened by the steamroller, he had withstood the impact, instead being pushed down to the underdeck by it. Kira grinned. He hadn't felt this alive for some time. He shot towards Cassius, their blades clashing, their individual movements indecipherable from the overall blur of swinging steel and sparking impacts.

---

< Saskana, Orbit, The Assault Shadow >

The Bridge was alive with warning sirens. Ascheron swept his arm forwards.

"Activate the Aegis field! Full power!"

The projectiles from the Pale Fire and Cabana Prime impacted the red-tinted forcefield which surrounded the Assault Shadow, disappearing, and reappearing at the opposite end of it, completely bypassing the ship. Ascheron grinned, before even more sirens sounded - these ones warned that the power reserves were too low. Damn Yetzirah, he thought. She knew we wouldn't have the powerplant to field this technology.

"Switch to conventional shielding! Return fire with everything we've got!"

---

OOS: Waiting on Malygos and Klak for the rest.

<Malchior IV, Claws camp>

*Lalli Cain gets out of the ship as well*

*Klak smiles at him*

Me: Good morning. Is everyone ready? I'm sure the others will arrive soon.


---

<Tunisia>

*The others follow Dave and Mike*

D-Klak: "Typical of our Stargaters today. You get shot if you pass some orange markers out in the middle of the freaking desert."

Bob: "Good thing these local tough guys warned us about it."

*D-Klak puts on the hood of his cloak to look mysterious as they approach the camp*

---

<Neo Z'traa>

*The Vrai is shocked*

Caiaphus: "We come to you in peace."

*The Vrai cautiously gets closer. He speaks to the Makuta with a slight accent*

???: "We do not trust outsiders, not after what they have done to our home. My people have been ravaged by countless wars, and your species was behind many of them!"

Caiaphus: "My species, but not my friends and I. We are here to make amends, and offer our help in restoring your planet."

*The Vrai stares at the Makuta, then seems to slightly nod*

???: "I am Max-Eli. You?"

Caiaphus: "I am Caiaphus."

---

<Barry's world>

Linkara: "I'm going to get him!"

Spoony: "No, we have to analyze his attack first!"

*Doug prepares to fight. Paul Latza searches for a weapon with Malcolm*

JC Denton: "Give me a chopper, and some guns, and I'll handle it."

*Suddenly, they see an old man emerge from the commotion. He smiles at the group*

Barry: "Hello, my friends. I'm just a Kind Old Man!"

Dr. Pavel: "Ah, then you are my friend."

*Dr. Pavel smiles, and tries to shake Barry's hand. Suddenly, Barry punches his face. Dr. Pavel screams as though he is inside of a falling plane*

Bring The Pain Barry: "JUST KIDDING! I'm a Mean Old Man, and I BRING THE PAIN!"

*His eyes glow red and he charges at the joke characters*

---

<Supermax 282>

*Agent 47 scowls at the prison bars before him*

Agent 47: "My client has asked me to inform you that this is the last prisoner you will ever see!"

Bars: "....Yessss....."

*Javert comes by, and scowls at Agent 47. Lemongrab follows him, and forces a smile*

Lemongrab: "A-acceptable."

---

<H3ll>

*The Heller smiles, as he senses a change in the universe. Some sort of "word filter" was no longer there. He could be as edgy as he wanted to, without any consequences! Truly, these were a bonkles Zone Power Battles™ after all!*

The Heller: "F*** yeah you f****ers! Nothing personnel!!"

*He hears the bleep that covers his words. It seems that he is too edgy, even for this realm and this website. He began to rage, and silently begged for Nif to be sent back to the multi-verse*

---

<Malchior IV, Bourba City>

*Asled is battered back by Dreis's kick, but he runs back into the fight. He punches Dreis in the face*

---

<Meme World, Surface>

CIA Guy: "Yeah, get on path, I'll call it in!"

*CIA starts trying to call it in*

*Everything happens*

--

<Meme World, Underground>

*TTT smiles*

TTT: "i wil join u and ur team with BONES nad friends we will save the univarse"

CIA Guy: "A lotta loyalty for hired guns! I'll do it!"

*The Memes Kid smiles underneath his tears*

*Hide the Pain Harold smiles, and nods. The remaining joke characters there, and near the crash site, accept the challenge. The Dong Squad members were sad, but they also had some hope. New memes and friends would arrive. The Donger would expand.*

Jesse Ventura: "Beautiful."

*The Heckler watches, and almost gives a heck . . . almost*

*Meanwhile, Big Man Tyrone prepares a personal message. He has learned of the death of Yon, See-Man, Shrek, and Tiny. He hopes he can inspire the joke characters to keep fighting the good fight*

---

<Saskana>

Spotter: "What?! You mean you don't fly into the air and shoot people from afar?!"

*Mazkertis dodges one of the bullets, but the other grazes his shoulder*

*He grunts in pain, and notices the shadow bolt heading at him. Mazkertis absorbs it, and fires it back at the javelins, destroying them*

Mazkertis: *telepathically to all* "Perhaps I have not been clear!"

*He raises his arms up, and his hands glow with purple magic energy. All of the characters nearby begin to feel as though they are about to fall asleep*

*Moe stops flying. D-Klak and Axalara are a few feet away from where Captain Eurobeat and Mazkertis are*

Mazkertis: "See what must be seen.....understand what must be understood!"

*A telepathic picture begins to form in everyone's mind*

Mazkertis: "For 50 years I was imprisoned by the Great Beings, your precious Klak's employers. I spent decades inside of a nethercell between universes, ever so close to my home, yet ever so far. My proximity to the particles of the netherrealm allowed me to see different dimensions and realities. There were many universes filled with war and suffering....but one.....one was at peace. A Utopian universe."

*The characters begin to see a beautiful world, with a wonderful city covering it. Near one building, a Matoran, Agori, and Protector (from bonkles 2015) are all discussing an economic issue, while several beings of species walk around them. The characters hear Mazkertis doing a voiceover*

Mazkertis: "Many worlds were united under the Intergalactic Confederation of Republics, the IGCR. Peoples of multiple systems and planets came together under one banner to discuss improving lives...."

*The group then sees a large parliamentary room, much like that of the United Nations. UU Nadle is at a desk table with a placard that says "Malchior IV." Other characters represent different planets. A Ta'har represents Tybion, a Cyberman represents Mondas, a Jawa represents Tatooine, an Autobot represents Cybertron. Thousands of representatives of thousands of worlds across the universe stand, calmly debating and discussing different issues. Kakamu presides over the committee.*

Mazkertis: "The IGCR pushed the boundaries of understanding, combining magic, alchemy, and science."

*Inside of a lab, UU Malygos holds up a beaker. UU Trixtin, UU Vultran, and UU Livia are engaged in their own experiments.*

Mazkertis: "Its education programs were the greatest in the universe."

*UU Zev is seen teaching a bunch of young alien children in a classroom.*

Mazkertis: "The IGCR's coalition spanned across many worlds, systems, galaxies even. Its only enemies were a few fringe tyrants on periphery worlds, all kept at bay by the valiant United Defense Force."

*UU Ynot, Blackout, Axalara, TPK, Captain Eurobeat are all standing on a mountain overlooking a large river. They are wearing grey military uniforms. Moe and Cutter run up to them, muttering a report. Ynot smiles*

UU Ynot: "We've done it again, lads. Another threat to our universe has been deterred."

*The UU versions of these characters all cheer*

Mazkertis: "I noticed a minor detail as I surveyed this magnificent universe. Klak was not there. He had never existed. This could not have been a coincidence. Every universe that I had had visions of had its own version of Klak, but this one? Nothing. Until I mentally jumped ahead a century later."

*The characters suddenly begin to see visions of a furious Klak charging into the utopian city, a large army of monsters and unpleasant individuals following him. Innocents are killed left and right, and minutes later, the city burns.*

Mazkertis: "That universe's Klak destroyed their utopia. He ravaged world after world for no reason at all. The Klak of the Dark Mirror universe has done the same to me, and your Klak has done many things to you. My research has led me to one conclusion: All Klaks are a force of destruction. With their coming they bring suffering and death. They may not intentionally bring pain, they may even fight against it, but it is their nature. It is inescapable. That is what I am trying to remedy. That is my crusade. "

*The vision ends. D-Klak (4) is speechless. Axalara silently sobs.*

OOS: Boom.

---

<Mordor>

*Figlio grins, and taps the staff on the ground. Suddenly, all of the robots, along with Eos, Hassan, and Turel are teleported to a realm that is pitch black. They are only able to see themselves, and each other. Everything else is darkness. Eos, Hassan, and Turel feel as though something is calling their minds from afar*

Figlio: "Welcome, friends....to the Zone of Shadows. The Keruvim is near."

OOS: DUN DUN DUN!!!

---

<Malchior IV>

Rainn: "I have no idea. The ZFT will likely expect us to go to Earth, or stay within the Malchior system. We have to go somewhere unexpected....a place where we will be lost in the crowd. How about Atuar Sadiares? I've heard about that city a few times. The original Rain never visited it, but maybe I can."

---

<The Bat-Cave>

Rahn: "Agreed. So how will we train?"

---

<Malchior IV, Senate>

*Senator Patr smiles, and leaves. A Congressman who looks a bit like Kevin Spacey walks by, looks at the camera, and smiles*

---

<Liquid-Metallicon>

Bartender: "How can you drink so many of those?!"

*Akzer comes back*

Akzer: "Are you coming?"

OOS: Waiting on Mally for the rest.

---

<Stouttish Islands>

*Suddenly, the police officers see a football land near them*

Moonbase Alpha Astronaut: "Stop or I'll challenge you to FOOTBALL!"