[GAME] Wish corruption

We do, but we are promptly exterminated by Daleks.

I wish people I invite to this forum would actually sign up AND POST.

We are promptly flooded with trolls.

I wish we could get more contributing non-troll users on to the forum

We do, but they get into fights with other members and leave, KoN-style.

I wish I had a fully-functioning, non-exploding PS3.

You do, but Sony promptly discontinues use of the PS3 and releases the PS4

I wish I had a Functioning Tank

You do, but you run into me. I am holding a Panzerfaust. The rest is history.

I wish I didn't have Music class.

You now have triple Phys Ed

I wish I commanded a nation with a microphone

You do, but someone declares war on your nation. Your microphone is then destroyed in a bombing raid.

I wish my keyboard didn't randomly change layouts whenever it feels like it.

It now randomly changes format whenever it doesn't feel like it

I wish My fantasies became reality

You do, but you accidentally fantasize about being stabbed by the Joker.

I wish Indian rupees were banned from this forum.

They are, but now Hylian Rupees replace them

I wish my bank account filled with money

Ynot wrote:They are, but now Hylian Rupees replace them

I wish my bank account filled with money

It is, but everything is suddenly stolen by a mysterious man wearing a top hat and trainers.

I wish I could move freaking schools already...

And so you do, into Eastlake high school, the worst school in Pinellas county Florida, in which you instantly become fresh meat for the gangs and rapists and murderers in training.

I wish things weren't slow at the moment

They are not, because we get craploads of new members which rapidly post in everything, so much so that we can't keep up.

I wish Media wasn't awkward.

It is no longer awkward, it is now Hawkward, as a hawk is now your teacher.

I wish I could relive High school, redoing certain things

You do. Unfortunately, that means you have to relive all of your boring classes again.

I wish I could relive select days from my high school years.

You do, but time shifts all the fun stuff on to different days,

I wish I could relive 01/08/2011

You can, but first you have to relive the rest of your life.

I wish every month was as active as January 2011 (in which we got about 1000 posts).

It becomes as active as January 2011, every month, and more. In fact, it becomes so active that we can no longer administrate it and it falls to the power of trolls.

I wish that my coat didn't have a rip in the sleeve D:

It now has a gash across the chest instead

I wish my phone had higher processing power and memory

It does, but it gains this by sapping processing power and memory from other phones. So, while your phone works perfectly, other people's phones stop working properly the moment you get near. When they realize the cause of this, they beat you up and smash your phone with a hammer.

I wish I didn't have a Biology test tomorrow.

You don't. Now you have a Physics test.

I wish everyone would take a joke once in a while.

They do, but now they think EVERYTHING is a joke, and take nothing seriously

I wish People were as ~sane~ as me

Everyone acts as if they had just seen Cthulhu.

I wish everyone was not as sane as I am.

Everyone turns into psychopaths.

I wish that there is no Yon rule in the chatbox.

There isn't, but now there is a rule against ALL your memes.

I wish it was Friday every day.

It is, but Friday becomes bland except the 6th one of the week, and you have induced confusion amongst the people.

I wish I got a full pay check everyday

You do, but everyday you accidentally let go of it and it is blown out of the window by a sharp gust of wind, never to be seen again.

I wish the chatbox could be on every page.

It is, but I ban you from it so you can't see it anyway.

I wish Transformers: Animated hadn't been cancelled.

It isn't but the animation and writing has dropped in quality to the point you wish it had been.

I wish that I was the prettiest princess in the land.

You are, but everyone else is really jealous and results in you having no friends.

I wish I could use Blender!

You do, but they're all to gaming what Twilight is to literature.

I wish I had a box full of healthy living ferrets.

You do, but your dad steps on it and they all die D:

I wish for a better PC.

You do, but you dad steps on it and it dies.

I wish I had a team of Pokemon that didn't get squashed every time i try to battle online

You do. However, Nintendo accuses you of Hax. Good luck running away from Dr. Haxx!

I wish the candidates I supported didn't get so much hate.

They don't, they in fact get office, and upon election, they are assassinated, along with the entirety of every government on the planet

I wish I could play Sburb

You can, but it is shut down/taken off/promptly discontinued/outlawed the next day.

I wish Google would stop being so nosy.

It stops being Nosy and starts outright stealing your data without any regard to your permission

I wish KoN realized Sburb isn't something that can be stopped once started.

He does. But since KoN cannot relate that to Legos, he eats Sburbs.

I wish Kon did not eat Sburbs

I. Eat. Your. SANDVICHES! instead.

I wish I could teleport.

And so you do, into the core of a star

I wish Klak's name was Vopor Asskick'o

I will take that name, but later. And with less a$$.

I wish I had a cool hat.

You do, but I steal it and throw it under a car.

I wish vending machines would stop shamelessly stealing my money.

They do. But now, mafioso gangsters begin stealing your money.

I wish DRJ would tell me to fight them more often.

He does, but you are unable to because you are kicked down a well.

I wish for world peace.

You do. But utopia cannot last long under HUMAN rule. Everything goes insane all over again.

I wish I could meet TMV.

You do, but he kicks you down a well.

I wish real life didn't keep preventing me from posting.

It doesn't. However, now posting keeps you from real-lifeing.

I wish that posting didn't do that!

It doesn't, instead it now drains your life energy.

I wish I lived in the BZPB multiverse.

You do, but the planet you live on is destroyed by Blackout.

I wish for an end to poverty.