[GAME] Wish corruption

They're scared off by Daleks.

I wish the Dalek would go away too

It does, and it decides to hide in DRJ's house.

I wish it would stop eating DRJ's food and leave his house.

It decides to visit your house instead.

I wish it'd just go away.

It goes away, but a kaiju takes its place.

I wish the kaiju would leave

It's destroyed by Trypticon.

I wish all these monsters would leave us alone.

They do, on the condition that we eat only marmite for a day.

I wish we didn't have to eat marmite to get them to go away.

We have to eat grapes instead.

I wish we didn't have to.

Instead we have to eat raisins.

I wish chocolate chip cookies and raisin cookies looked completely different

Chocolate chip cookies now have green slime all over them.

I wish they looked alright.

They look like raisin cookies now.

I wish that the world gryphon population was higher than one...

Another gryphon appears, but he is chopped in half, and one of the halves is taken away by aliens. The population is now one and a half.

I wish the aliens had left the gryphon alone!

The aliens come back, and reattach the gryphon's other half.

I wish the gryphon was a nice female...

She is, but her lower half keeps falling off.

I wish it would stop doing that!

She stops falling apart, but she doesn't like you now.

I wish she was my girl.

She dumps you.

I wish for Muse concert tickets.

You get the tickets, but they are for last year's big concert.

I wish DRJ had tickets to the next Muse concert!

He does... But they are for a concert from the 90's

I wish I was the Dovahkiin!

You're Alessia, and thus long dead.

I wish Belgium had a government already.

They get one... But it's a crappy government, like America's.

I wish I could bring my drawings to life.

You drew a bull, which charges at you.

I wish for good grades on my exams.

You get good grades, on all but your French.

I wish that my Xbox hadn't given me the Red Ring of Death!

Your PC instead gives you Blue Screens of Death whenever you try to open Skype.

I wish for a pet cat.

You get a friendly jaguar

I wish that I could make a quantum warp drive just by accidentally dividing by zero

It takes you to another galaxy, and your calculator's battery was completely drained by the jump. Bye.

I wish air fresheners actually did what they should do, rather than stink up the place.

They do, but now the air is so pure, you cannot breathe it.

I wish DRJ could breathe!

DRJ can now breathe underwater.

I wish I had a clone now.

You do, but this clone is your complete opposite in terms of personality.

I wish this clone were like Kosmic (Welcome to BZPB, by the way!)

The clone is more like me now there is 2 of me.

I wish Super Kami Guru were here to tell as in description of Nails first day on the job, to all of us.
I wish Super Kami Guru were here to tell as in description of Nails first day on the job, to all of us.
(thanks, and that if anyone knows is from DBZ abridged)

He is here, but as soon as he starts to speak he dies, turning to stone.

I wish he'd turn into a fish on a dish

A cat eats him.

I wish for a cat.

You get a hungry tiger

I wish the hungry tiger becomes supernaturally enhanced.

It does, but only Brian Blessed can ride it.

I wish all BZPB members were able to ride the supernaturally enhanced tiger.

It will only go east.

I wish it could go in all directions!

It can, but it CHOOSES to go straight up into outer space, suffocating us all

I wish I had a Tandem psychic war elephant

The war elephant uses its psychic powers to attack you instead of your foes.

I wish Ynot and the war elephant would make amends.

We do, and I ride it into the FBI, CIA, DoD, and all other Alphabet Soup Departments and destroy them all.

I wish this wish wouldn't be corrupted

This whole topic magically disappears.

I wish it wouldn't.

It doesn't, but instead manifests physically as a magical lamp that hops from member to member in a completely random order, and actually corrupts your wishes in the real world

I wish I had every video game ever, the time and financial security to play them, and a room full of friends to enjoy them with.

Due to their sheer number, you are forced to stock your video games outside your house, where many are stolen by unscrupulous ruffians. Of course, they only ever take your favourites, leaving you with movie games or the infamous E.T.

I wish Ynot also had somewhere safe to put them all.

I now have a mansion large enough to house all of BZPBs members, past preset and future, but you're not invited.

I wish Jones would lively happily ever after with his prince charming

He does, but his prince charming is actually a frigid rug that nearly makes him freeze to death.

I wish they would get a divorce.

He gets all my money.

I wish Ynot would post!

I did, but they are all short, and not very satisfying, let alone worth the Weight

I wish I had shadow clones

They're all six inches tall and keep snooping on your mum in the shower.

I wish they wouldn't spy on Ynot's mum.

They instead spy on Car Guard's mum.

I wish we could calm down Car Guard.